Post Op Appt/Weigh In

Had my first post-op appt with Dr. PeopleSkills.

Had my staples out, which was less painful and scary than I had imagined (aren't most things?!). Still hurt though.

Also, I was weighed. The last time I was weighed was around Dec 10th, when I had my last pre-op appointment. Since then, I've lost 19 lbs (41 lbs since the beginning of April). Yay!

In celebration, since I can't wear anything that doesn't have a stretchy waist, I bought new (and on clearance) jogging pants. Very exciting.

Christmas

Christmas was fun. I enjoyed spending time with my family and my future inlaws.

It was a bit of a struggle when others could eat the Christmas feast (cookies and scalloped potatoes, my favorites!) though and I was forced to eat 2 oz of pureed soups. I admit, I did end up licking a cookie that had Splenda sprinkled on it, but it was for the greater good--it staved off a psychotic break brought on by cravings and jealousy.

Staples and a stitch

I have ten staples and one stitch (one stitch. hardcore, right?) that I would pay dearly for someone to remove ASAP. Anyone? Just kidding...mostly. I get them removed on Monday, but that seem so far away. Freaking skin itches around them. Doing my best not to scratch.

Fall

My pants leg got caught when I put down the foot rest on my recliner, making me fall on my hands and knees. Ugh.

Didn't hurt anything on my stomach externally. Internally, I'm waiting to see if I get nauseated or have swelling, which would be I tore something on the surgery site and am bleeding internally. If not, and the surgeon's nurse suspects I won't because my fall was already 15 minutes ago and symptoms should have already begun to show, I didn't tear anything. <-- Here's to hoping!

However, my damn knee hurts. (ETA: and still hurts, though thankfully not as bad, as of 12/28/11)

Cabin Fever

My cabin fever is bad enough that I am willing to go Christmas shopping with my mom tonight.

I don't like stores of people when I feel good. Feeling bad is going to make me try to run people over--"an eye for an eye" thing after having my heels slammed into with a cart, which happens nearly every stinking time I go shopping. It's easier to be mean back to people when I'm sick or grumpy.

Mom's probably only taking me for my disabled parking. ;)

ETA: It actually wasn't bad. I didn't want to bludgeon anyone with the nearest piece of cheap plastic crap I could reach. Still too many people, but no one obnoxious.

Pureed foods blow

I had to break out my Chocolate protein shake for something that tasted normal.

Pureed food sucks.

If I weren't on narcotics and alone, I may be tempted to go to McDs, get a hamburger, and lick the burger, just to taste something familiar (and good) instead of various mushed blah. <--I wouldn't actually do it, with or without narcotics in my system, but desperation for normal makes you think funny things.

Home is scary

I have to say that it's a little scary to be home.

At the hospital, I knew that, if a problem arose, the staff would be on it right away. Now, I'm the one to have to decide if a symptom needs to be run by someone and to make that phone call.

I'm on a major pain killer. Should I really be in charge of anything? lol

Plus, I'm on less of them (bye, bye Toradal. I'll miss you, my friend.) so things suddenly feel worse, making me unnecessarily worried.

Drain removal and going home

You know that scene in Alien, where the little alien shoots from the guys stomach? Yeah, I now know what a less violent version of that feels like! *eek!*

There was a drain tube in the middle of my abdomen, somewhere around my stomach. The doctor slowly pulled that out. I could feel it move, touching organs that should never feel external touch, as it made its way to the surface and out of my body. *shudder*

I've now had my stomach tickled from the inside. I don't recommend it. Plus, it hurts like a bitch when it finally makes it out of the little incision on the skin.

The drain removal was a pre-parole activity. I'm at home :D

Fooooooood, etc.

I get to eat!!!!!!

ETA: I don't remember if I was allowed 30 cc an hour or 60 cc. Either way, it was yummy, because I'd been deprived. Cream of chicken soup will probably never be yummy in any other situation. At this point, I was also able to drink as much as I wanted.

I'm doing laps in the hallway for entertainment. Hospitals are boring, even with free movies (seriously, who can watch Inception on narcotics?!)

I have an ache in my abdomen, a little pain at the incision sites, and sore muscles from being stuck in a bed for too long. Otherwise, I'm good. Nothing that I can really complain about.

Morphine was done yesterday, mostly at my request. I'd be a horrible opium addict. Shit gives me a headache.

Hospital Rambles

Few things...
1) Yay, Travis is coming to visit me! I haven't seen him since around 8 PM on Thursday, at which time I was loopy and all post-opish. I'm a big baby when I'm hurt and I want Travis cuddles.

Last night I told him to stay home because the three visitors I had exhausted me and it would have been a waste of a drive for him to come watch me sleep. Tonight, we're going to watch a movie and I'm going to get me some cuddles.

(ETA: yeah, I zonked out within a half hour of him showing up. Drugs are good, but they make me sleepy)

2) Heprin shots hurt like a mother.

3) Heprin allows for some spectacular bruises. My abdomen is covered in them...and adhesive. I'm all bruisy and sticky.

4) I'm suppose to go home tomorrow morning. I will be so happy to see Travis and be at home, but mostly I will be happy that there will be no one trying to stab me with a needle!

Day 1, Post-op

I am doing well. :) Surgery was yesterday at 1 PM, was out of recovery and into my room at 7 PM, and I was up and walking around a bit by 10 AM today. I have some pain, but not a lot. Mostly, I am just tired.

Made it through

I've been out of surgery/recovery for about 12 hours. Seems to be going well.

I'm in some pain, but not a major amount. The pain I can deal with. What I want more than anything is to sleep, but he evil nurse and CNA keep waking me up for vitals, shots, etc.

I'm rather proud that the above is coherent, since I'm nicely medded up.

Stomach surgery today and I'm hungry!

Ever notice that, when you're really hungry, time slows down until all you can focus on is the hunger? That's where I'm at. I haven't eaten since before I fell asleep last night around 8 PM. I don't even check in at the hospital until 10:30. I'm going to go all cannibal on someone before then!

Travis will go crazy without me.

I'll be in the hospital for three days. The cats are going to drive Travis cah-razy! Mwahahahahaha! He can barely handle one night when he has the night off and I'm at work because Emilee is soooooo verrrrrrry neeeeeeedy. He'll be certifiable by the time I get home. This amuses me. I'm mean. :D

Three days and counting

At about this time in three days, I should be heading to Recovery. Eeeek!

Last pre-op appt with surgeon

Had my final pre-op appointment with Dr. H. My surgeon has no people skills. He's great at what he does, but if he called me "big" one more time I was going to sock him in the nose.

Date aquired!

Received my surgery date! It's Dec 15th. That's less than ten days away. Eeek!

I'm both excited and scared. Mostly excited.

Disappointing Pre-Op Appt

Yesterday kinda sucked.

I had what I was told would be my last appointment with the surgeon before my GBP surgery. Turned out that it wasn't.

Woke up at 7 AM (normally, an hour BEFORE my bedtime!) for my 9 AM appt. Met my mom at the clinic and headed up to the office.

The doctor doesn't have people skills. I'd forgotten that since I saw him last in April. It would have gone better had I remembered and been prepared.

He asked me when I'd had caffeine last. I was honest and said I'd had some sips of mom's the other day, but I'm basically off it completely. He began to scold me about how one sip was too much and that's how people fail their weight loss surgery.

As I said, I wasn't prepared for his scolding and took it a little hard. Also, because I am awesome, I'd missed a few of my anti-anxiety pills and I was tired, so I was far more easily upset.
Finally, all of my other appointments have had nothing but praise from the rest of the pre-op team, so the negative reaction was unexpected.

The doc said he would have to review what the rest of the team reported, but he didn't think there would be any reason to deny me the surgery. Once he reviewed everything, he would submit to
my insurance that he feels I qualify. Once he hears back from them that they also approve, I'll get a call and schedule a surgery date.

As far as I understood, by the time of yesterday's appointment, all of the reviewing and approving should have been done and I was going to schedule my surgery at the appointment. I was, I think, understandably upset. All the doc did was yell at me and poke at my stomach, so
it felt like a waste of time being there.

Now, I sit and wait for a call or letter saying I was approved, which will probably take another week. Then, I schedule the surgery and, THEN, I see the surgeon once again in his office a
few days before going under the knife.

I'm just so tired of this dragging on. I want to move forward, get past the surgery, and get on with my life. Meh.

SV and an NSV

Scale Victory:

As of the beginning of tonight's work shift, I've lost 26.4 lbs.

I never wrote it down, but my personal mini goal was always to hit a loss of 25 lbs. I'd be at 23 or 24, but couldn't quite hit my goal. Tonight, I hit it was 1.4 lbs to spare. :)

Non-Scale Victory:

Besides hitting the 25 pound mark, I finished all of my group therapy appointments for my GB pre-op program. Can't even express how happy I am about that.

Those appointments should have taken 12 weeks. Honestly, I think it took me more like 18-20 to finish because I missed so many, due to either being so tired from working a 12 hour shift or
because I worked the night of the meeting. I thought they'd never end!

The meetings themselves were good. Getting to know other people going through what I am going through was beneficial. The people, especially the ones near the end, were fantastic to
talk to. We could laugh and joke and then also get serious when we needed to. Between the people and the material covered, I learned a lot. It was just the time of day that sucked and made it so hard for me to get there.

Now, I can sleep until a decent time on Wednesdays-- 5 PM, preferably. This makes me very happy. 3rd shift people need their sleep too!

Time to own up...

I'm not doing so good with keeping myself on track with my surgery pre-op program lately.

1) I've been off my thyroid med for two weeks. Until it is stable, I can't have the surgery. It'll take me a few months to get my levels stable again.

2) I had a massive migraine for three days this week, beginning Monday. I didn't even look at my appointment calendar, because I couldn't deal with trying to call people anyway. I wasn't
sure I had any appointments to begin with. Turns out, I had three. Now, I have to call and explain the situation and, hopefully, this won't derail me too much--in the past, it has taken me a month to get in with the Nutritionist.

3) My attendance at my Learn meetings has been sporadic. I'm required to attend 12 of them. I've made it to 2. Some missed meetings were due to work--legitimate reason. Others, it's because they're at a time that's horrible for me and I oversleep. Not legitimate.

These issues aren't stopping me from having the surgery. They're just creating frustrating delays. The thyroid issue will put me out into November for the surgery, and that's if the level is perfect after just a few months. Sometimes it takes longer after a slip up. The appointments can be rescheduled and I have plans to call on Monday. The learn meetings, well, by the end of August I should have 7 done. I can try to schedule individual Learns, but, otherwise I should be done Oct 19th.

I guess I'm just mad at myself because these delays were preventable. I don't want my surgery so close to the holidays, but I do want it done before 2012 (already met my insurance deductible
for 2011).

What's done is done. All I can do is continue moving forward from here, right? I think part of it was that I was getting burned out from all of the stuff I needed to do for this. Well, I've had a break, so it's time to recommit and that's exactly what I plan to do. :)