I am a woman with a good doctor visit and a plan.
I saw my Internist for my 9 month follow up. He thinks I am doing well. We went over my meds AND talked about the possibility of getting pregnant around my year Surg-iversary.
He said that all of my meds are okay for pregnancy, even my anti anxiety med. That's a relief. It was also nice to, for the first time, not have the "pregnancies are high risk for someone of your weight" convo. I'm still overweight (50 lbs from my goal of 150 lbs), but not like I was.
He gave me a nice overview of how the medical staff would help me handle a pregnancy too. He explained that they would probably want me to keep my weight stable for the first six months, when the baby isn't really growing large. Then, around 6 months, they would have me increase my calories by a few hundred a day. They would expect me to gain around 15 lbs for the rest of my pregnancy and lose nearly all of that when giving birth.
Having that conversation and information really made me feel like having a baby is possible. It's a pretty great feeling. I walked out of the office smiling and, quite honestly, nearly tearing up.
*rubs hands together excitedly* I can soon stop practicing making babies and really go for it.
Since I am about to get what I hope to be my last birth control shot and that will last three months, I am really recommitting to losing weight before I try to get pregnant. My plan (see, I said I am a woman in possession of a plan), is to up my exercise and start logging my food. Having an end goal (babies!) helps my commitment.
I am going to shoot for 1000 calories a day, BUT I'm changing things up in that I plan eat the extra calories that I exercise off. So, without exercising, I can eat 1000 calories. If I go for a nice long, brisk walk and burn 200 calories, then I am allowed an extra 200 calories that day. It gives me more motivation and 1000 calories is pretty low anyway for someone who weighs 202 lbs.
Okay, i have to get back to work. Break's over!
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Here's what I am finding, at nearly 9 months post op: it's getting easier to eat and drink what I shouldn't, because it doesn't have the physical consequences as often (vomiting, feeling icky, etc.) .
Here's what I have decided to do about it: 1) eat what I should a vast majority of the time and eat what I shouldn't at a minimum; 2) if I am keeping to that philosophy, don't feel guilty when I do have things that may not be great for me.
Here's what I have decided to do about it: 1) eat what I should a vast majority of the time and eat what I shouldn't at a minimum; 2) if I am keeping to that philosophy, don't feel guilty when I do have things that may not be great for me.
I have a tough life, I tell you: worked Monday, had three days off for fun and sun, I work tomorrow, and I have a three day weekend. I just don't know how I get through weeks like this.
On Tuesday, I headed to the Wisconsin Dells area. My aunt is an Avon rep and she had a conference at the Kalahari hotel that morning. Thanks to being a business owner, she gets a corporate discount on hotels, so my aunt, her son, his wife, their three kids (8, 5, and 3 yrs old), and I stayed overnight in a suite with three king beds and two bathrooms (beautiful large tubs!!). The hotel sported a conference center, indoor water park, outdoor water park, and an indoor theme park. HUGE.
We arrived in town around 9 AM. Auntie T headed to her conference and my cousins, their brood, and I hit the indoor water park. Wow, there were at least 8 big water slides, I know of five hot tubs, and at least three structures that had lots of slides and such for younger kids. We had a great time.
T's conference only lasted a couple hours. We met up with her around 1 or 2 PM and had lunch. For me, that was a little tough, because all of the food I brought was still in the car, as we couldn't check in until 4 PM. I ended up with a salad while everyone else had a huge cheesy pizza. Pizza was one of my favorite foods, so I was a bit envious.
Unfortunately, we had to sit around for a few hours waiting for our room to be ready. You could tell everyone was exhausted--a three hour road trip in the early AM and tons of running and playing in water will do that to kids and adults alike.
Finally, we were able to get into our room, get settled, and have a snack.
I think it was five when we all headed for the outdoor water park. My aunt and I took the kids on lots of water slides. I'd never been on one before, because I'd been too big and too self conscious. I'd been missing out! That was so much fun!
By the time we headed back to our room when the park closed at dusk, my calves were quite sore from running up stairs to slides and walking through water for hours.
We ate some more, I took a long, yummy bath in the deep tub, and most of us were in bed by 10:30 PM.
Next day, we got our stuff together, went for breakfast (food challenge #2, since most options were pancakes, french toast, hash browns, etc.). I had a fruit, yogurt, and granola parfait. We then loaded up the car, as our check out was at 11 AM, and headed back to the indoor water park for a while.
I think I was just too damn tired from all of the activity to enjoy the water as much as I had. In fact, I barely went in. I walked behind the littlest kid while he floated down a mini (1.0 ft deep) lazy river and then I went alone on the adult version. I did, however, have fun being with everyone. Just didn't have the energy for racing up steps and swimming with the kids. Plus, I was walking like an old woman, thanks to the calves I'd pulled the day before. :P
My aunt was the unofficial photographer on Wednesday and there are pictures of me in just my swimsuit. She's evil. She and the camera must be destroyed!!
We headed home around 3 PM, I believe. I slept most of the way. When we arrived back at my cousin's place, I was still barely awake when we unloaded their vehicle. In fact, I was so out of it, that I didn't notice I was stung in my arm by a bee for a minute. I'm allergic, but didn't react much.
I made it home in time to say adios to my honey who was heading off to work. That was nice, because he was still at work when I left on Tuesday morning.
I took Thursday (today) off of work, because I knew I'd still be exhausted. I was right. I'm also still trying to walk like a normal person with the pulled muscles in my legs.
I want to complain about the muscles, but, really, it's a good thing. That means I pushed my body further than it is use to. That is something I should try to achieve often.
On Tuesday, I headed to the Wisconsin Dells area. My aunt is an Avon rep and she had a conference at the Kalahari hotel that morning. Thanks to being a business owner, she gets a corporate discount on hotels, so my aunt, her son, his wife, their three kids (8, 5, and 3 yrs old), and I stayed overnight in a suite with three king beds and two bathrooms (beautiful large tubs!!). The hotel sported a conference center, indoor water park, outdoor water park, and an indoor theme park. HUGE.
We arrived in town around 9 AM. Auntie T headed to her conference and my cousins, their brood, and I hit the indoor water park. Wow, there were at least 8 big water slides, I know of five hot tubs, and at least three structures that had lots of slides and such for younger kids. We had a great time.
T's conference only lasted a couple hours. We met up with her around 1 or 2 PM and had lunch. For me, that was a little tough, because all of the food I brought was still in the car, as we couldn't check in until 4 PM. I ended up with a salad while everyone else had a huge cheesy pizza. Pizza was one of my favorite foods, so I was a bit envious.
Unfortunately, we had to sit around for a few hours waiting for our room to be ready. You could tell everyone was exhausted--a three hour road trip in the early AM and tons of running and playing in water will do that to kids and adults alike.
Finally, we were able to get into our room, get settled, and have a snack.
I think it was five when we all headed for the outdoor water park. My aunt and I took the kids on lots of water slides. I'd never been on one before, because I'd been too big and too self conscious. I'd been missing out! That was so much fun!
By the time we headed back to our room when the park closed at dusk, my calves were quite sore from running up stairs to slides and walking through water for hours.
We ate some more, I took a long, yummy bath in the deep tub, and most of us were in bed by 10:30 PM.
Next day, we got our stuff together, went for breakfast (food challenge #2, since most options were pancakes, french toast, hash browns, etc.). I had a fruit, yogurt, and granola parfait. We then loaded up the car, as our check out was at 11 AM, and headed back to the indoor water park for a while.
I think I was just too damn tired from all of the activity to enjoy the water as much as I had. In fact, I barely went in. I walked behind the littlest kid while he floated down a mini (1.0 ft deep) lazy river and then I went alone on the adult version. I did, however, have fun being with everyone. Just didn't have the energy for racing up steps and swimming with the kids. Plus, I was walking like an old woman, thanks to the calves I'd pulled the day before. :P
My aunt was the unofficial photographer on Wednesday and there are pictures of me in just my swimsuit. She's evil. She and the camera must be destroyed!!
We headed home around 3 PM, I believe. I slept most of the way. When we arrived back at my cousin's place, I was still barely awake when we unloaded their vehicle. In fact, I was so out of it, that I didn't notice I was stung in my arm by a bee for a minute. I'm allergic, but didn't react much.
I made it home in time to say adios to my honey who was heading off to work. That was nice, because he was still at work when I left on Tuesday morning.
I took Thursday (today) off of work, because I knew I'd still be exhausted. I was right. I'm also still trying to walk like a normal person with the pulled muscles in my legs.
I want to complain about the muscles, but, really, it's a good thing. That means I pushed my body further than it is use to. That is something I should try to achieve often.
Sunday, August 26, 2012
This coming Thursday, I get to experience the joy of my "yearly". Someone's going to clip a metal duck bill to my cervix. Fuuuuun!
Since I am eight and a half months out from surgery and the whole point of my surgery was to be able to have babies, I'm going to ask my doctor when I can go off my birth control--when will I be able to take in enough calories to sustain me and a baby. I eat 1000 calories a day at the moment.
That being said, I know a couple people who are pregnant and about the same distance from their surgery. They're doing fine, so I have hope that I can go off my Depo shot soon.
Since I am eight and a half months out from surgery and the whole point of my surgery was to be able to have babies, I'm going to ask my doctor when I can go off my birth control--when will I be able to take in enough calories to sustain me and a baby. I eat 1000 calories a day at the moment.
That being said, I know a couple people who are pregnant and about the same distance from their surgery. They're doing fine, so I have hope that I can go off my Depo shot soon.
Saturday, August 25, 2012
We've been dealing with some rough financial times, thanks to an expensive vet visit (Laelah had another UTI. Bah!) and my honey not being paid by Unemployment on three occasions this summer. But, sometimes a girl needs to go shopping anyway, especially when most of her clothes are too big...some of them are ridiculously so.
My mom wanted to hit Kmart today, to see if they had any decent sales, so we headed that way.
Kmart is in a strip mall with Fashion bug and I saw a sign at FB saying "Fit Right Jeans $14.99"! I damn near jumped out of the moving car. Earlier today, I was complaining that I had been too broke to take advantage of a 50% off Fashion Bug web sale last weekend. I like their jeans but I hate paying $35 for them. This was too perfect.
Of course, by the time I left, I spent $65, but that was on two awesome bras and two pair of jeans. Personally, I don't think that is bad at all. The exciting part was that I shopped in the missy section, instead of the plus size. :) That's a first.
Finally, we made our way over to Kmart, where I found a couple tanks. I also found some Joe Boxer panties that were sexy and cute. Again, bought in the missy section, NOT plus. Yaaaay!
Mom and I headed to her house to assess our hoard. I'd try something on, she'd say, "ooh, I should borrow that from you sometime", and I'd take it off and hand it to her to try on. That's when she said, "it's weird being able to wear each others clothes, isn't it?"
That stopped me for a minute and then I laughed. It's true! I haven't been small enough to share clothes with anyone as long as I can remember. It's a happy, new experience.
In summary, clothes are more fun when you have variety in your size
My mom wanted to hit Kmart today, to see if they had any decent sales, so we headed that way.
Kmart is in a strip mall with Fashion bug and I saw a sign at FB saying "Fit Right Jeans $14.99"! I damn near jumped out of the moving car. Earlier today, I was complaining that I had been too broke to take advantage of a 50% off Fashion Bug web sale last weekend. I like their jeans but I hate paying $35 for them. This was too perfect.
Of course, by the time I left, I spent $65, but that was on two awesome bras and two pair of jeans. Personally, I don't think that is bad at all. The exciting part was that I shopped in the missy section, instead of the plus size. :) That's a first.
Finally, we made our way over to Kmart, where I found a couple tanks. I also found some Joe Boxer panties that were sexy and cute. Again, bought in the missy section, NOT plus. Yaaaay!
Mom and I headed to her house to assess our hoard. I'd try something on, she'd say, "ooh, I should borrow that from you sometime", and I'd take it off and hand it to her to try on. That's when she said, "it's weird being able to wear each others clothes, isn't it?"
That stopped me for a minute and then I laughed. It's true! I haven't been small enough to share clothes with anyone as long as I can remember. It's a happy, new experience.
In summary, clothes are more fun when you have variety in your size
Monday, August 20, 2012
Guess what! I down 4.6 pounds since my last weigh in two weeks ago. That means I weigh 202.2 pounds. I am soooo close to being out of the two-hundreds!
I thought I would touch on something that most people will have to make a decision on at some point post-op...alcoholic beverages.
My surgery program discourages drinking alcoholic beverages for a few reasons.
Personally, I am far enough out that I mostly eat like a regular person (if I wanted, I could eat most any food, but in a small portion). I am at the point where my weight loss is becoming more and more due to my food and exercise choices. The leg-up/jump start from the surgery is fading fast and I am choosing to find a balance. I am learning to eat well, with the occasional SMALL indulgence. If I think I may want to have an extra 1/2 tablespoon of peanut butter on my sandwich or glass of wine in the evening, I account for that in my daily food intake. If I don't account for it, then I know there will be a consequence if my food intake/calories burned ratio is too out of balance.
As I mention above in point #2, I do get buzzed far more quickly. One glass of wine or one shot can make me intoxicated. I was a major light-weight before the surgery (alcohol-wise, anyway :P ) and I take a medication that lowers my alcohol tolerance. With a very strong family history of alcoholism, I keep a close eye on how much and how often I drink.
I don't think alcohol is the greatest thing ever and I don't think it's evil. As with our journey with food, all things in moderation and with mindfulness.
I thought I would touch on something that most people will have to make a decision on at some point post-op...alcoholic beverages.
My surgery program discourages drinking alcoholic beverages for a few reasons.
- With the smaller stomach post-op comes a much lowered alcohol tolerance. It is very easy to have just one drink and be hammered, even though it would have taken two or three times that (at least for me) to get to the same point before the surgery.
- With the increased ease of becoming intoxicated comes the increase risk of alcoholism. There are several people who have gone through our program and had to enter AA because of the alcohol addiction issues they developed post-operatively.
- Alcohol is a lot of sugar calories with no nutritional benefit. Post-op, we're suppose to take in calories only to nourish our bodies, not for the pleasure of it or the emotions--happy or sad--attached to a food or drink.
Personally, I am far enough out that I mostly eat like a regular person (if I wanted, I could eat most any food, but in a small portion). I am at the point where my weight loss is becoming more and more due to my food and exercise choices. The leg-up/jump start from the surgery is fading fast and I am choosing to find a balance. I am learning to eat well, with the occasional SMALL indulgence. If I think I may want to have an extra 1/2 tablespoon of peanut butter on my sandwich or glass of wine in the evening, I account for that in my daily food intake. If I don't account for it, then I know there will be a consequence if my food intake/calories burned ratio is too out of balance.
As I mention above in point #2, I do get buzzed far more quickly. One glass of wine or one shot can make me intoxicated. I was a major light-weight before the surgery (alcohol-wise, anyway :P ) and I take a medication that lowers my alcohol tolerance. With a very strong family history of alcoholism, I keep a close eye on how much and how often I drink.
I don't think alcohol is the greatest thing ever and I don't think it's evil. As with our journey with food, all things in moderation and with mindfulness.
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Been quiet for a while. As I get further and further away from my surgery, I'm finding life to be returning to normal. Fewer "firsts" to experience.
That being said, I had one today. . .
Travis and I are house/dog sitting for his parents. They live on about an acre of land, with neighbors not too far away, separated by a row of trees that don't fully block people from seeing into each others yards.
They have a pool and I LOVE to swim. Forgetting my swimsuit was stupid but I desperately wanted to swim, so I threw on a sports bra, a pair of panties, and a tee shirt and headed out back to the pool. I figured no one would know that I didn't have a real swimsuit on anyway.
I found out very quickly that cool August nights has an unhappy affect on pool water. I was in up to my chest and couldn't handle how cold it was. I got out after about five minutes, but I was really enjoying the wonderful sunshine and didn't want to head in. Sunbathing sounded yummy.
Standing in the yard, I looked around and didn't see any of the neighbors. It made me brave. So, I whipped off my tee shirt and laid in the sun in just my panties and bra. I can honestly say that I have NEVER done that before. Never, ever.
No, I wasn't 100% comfortable with having my thighs and stomach exposed if someone were to see me, but I also felt like, "what the hell? Who cares? If someone sees and doesn't like the view, I guess they should turn away then." The longer I laid out there, the less I cared. Two hours later, I was still super pale (I suspect that by body rejects UVs after so many years of not getting any) but very relaxed.
I have no plans of running around like that again, but it was an interesting experience. Something I certainly wouldn't have done at my highest weight.
Edited to add: I do have some sunburn on my stomach. I'm so surprised and amused! Seriously, my body usually rejects and reflects UVs and I'm left just as pale as before the sun exposure. The burn isn't bad at all and I guess I should have expected some because I don't think my stomach has ever seen sunlight before.
That being said, I had one today. . .
Travis and I are house/dog sitting for his parents. They live on about an acre of land, with neighbors not too far away, separated by a row of trees that don't fully block people from seeing into each others yards.
They have a pool and I LOVE to swim. Forgetting my swimsuit was stupid but I desperately wanted to swim, so I threw on a sports bra, a pair of panties, and a tee shirt and headed out back to the pool. I figured no one would know that I didn't have a real swimsuit on anyway.
I found out very quickly that cool August nights has an unhappy affect on pool water. I was in up to my chest and couldn't handle how cold it was. I got out after about five minutes, but I was really enjoying the wonderful sunshine and didn't want to head in. Sunbathing sounded yummy.
Standing in the yard, I looked around and didn't see any of the neighbors. It made me brave. So, I whipped off my tee shirt and laid in the sun in just my panties and bra. I can honestly say that I have NEVER done that before. Never, ever.
No, I wasn't 100% comfortable with having my thighs and stomach exposed if someone were to see me, but I also felt like, "what the hell? Who cares? If someone sees and doesn't like the view, I guess they should turn away then." The longer I laid out there, the less I cared. Two hours later, I was still super pale (I suspect that by body rejects UVs after so many years of not getting any) but very relaxed.
I have no plans of running around like that again, but it was an interesting experience. Something I certainly wouldn't have done at my highest weight.
Edited to add: I do have some sunburn on my stomach. I'm so surprised and amused! Seriously, my body usually rejects and reflects UVs and I'm left just as pale as before the sun exposure. The burn isn't bad at all and I guess I should have expected some because I don't think my stomach has ever seen sunlight before.
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Some victories to write about!
1) I finally weigh less than my honey. It's only a few pounds, but it still feels good. We're a foot apart in height, so I'm still far more overweight than he is, but I am still happy.
2) I can fit comfortably in his shirts. Waaaaaay back in the beginning of writing this blog, I mentioned that one of my girly goals was to be able to wear one of his shirts to bed if I felt like it. I can!
3) Ran into some old coworkers that I haven't seen in a couple years. They kept going on about thin my face was and that I looked great. That's a pretty awesome pick-me-up. :)
~*~*~*~*~
Okay, this is unrelated to my weight loss, but I have to put it down so I don't forget...
Last Friday, my honey and I decided to go to the drive in theater. We stopped at a gas station with a Subway in it on the way, to have something to eat. I ordered and paid for my sandwich first because Travis wanted to fill the car and order his own.
I was standing by the gas station door, waiting for Travis to finish paying for his sub, when the guy next to him passed out cold and hit his head on the cement floor! It was such a gross, loud noise (probably louder now, in my memory, than it really was). Of course, everyone just stood there for a second, in shock about what just happened.
Finally, we all start moving. I came forward and said not to move him. I mentioned I'd worked in an emergency room for several years and that was something that they never want you to do when someone has fallen and hit their head. ... and then I paused, looked at everyone, held up my hands, and said, "but I am NOT a nurse." lol Just wanted to make that clear!
Anyway...
Two people called for an ambulance. I checked to see if the passed out guy's head was bleeding. I didn't find any blood on the ground around his head. As I was feeling around, his eyes popped open. Then, before we could say anything, he jumped up off the floor to a standing position.
He did have a small laceration on the back of his head. Nothing major, but he left a splotch of blood on the floor and a little on his neck. It either split open from the impact or one of the tiles cut him.
His coloring was still very green/gray and I was concerned he'd go down again. The gas station attendant and I walked him to a booth and I sat with him while we waited for the ambulance. I kept talking to him to keep him awake. Travis came over a chatted a bit too.
He said he was in a band and they'd been practicing all day with very little water. He figured he passed out from dehydration, which wouldn't have been surprising. We've been experiencing some wicked hot weather lately.
The thing he seemed most concerned about was that he didn't have insurance. I explained that most hospitals have programs to pay part or all of costs for people without insurance who really need emergency care. I told him he needed to have his head and neck checked out because he hit so hard on the ground...and I followed it up with another, "but I am NOT a nurse" comment.
It took about 10 minutes from the time he woke up for the ambulance to arrive. That's when Travis and I headed out. I knew, from experience, that the EMTs would do their very best to get him to go to the hospital for his own good. There was a possible neck injury and brain bleed from smacking on the cement ground. They take that very seriously.
We headed to the movies and were talking animatedly, thanks to the surge of adrenaline. It was hard to calm down, but eventually we did, though multiple times, we both said, "I sure hope he is okay."
I haven't seen any sad news about a death from at accident at Subway, so I'm confident that the guy good to go, even if he is sore.
Travis seems to still be upset with himself that he didn't catch the guy as he went down. I have explained time and time again that no one else expected that of him. I hate that he feels guilty. I wasn't up close when this happened, so I could see all of the people and what transpired. There was just no way for it to have happened like he thinks it should have. For wanting to have helped more, I give him hugs and kisses.
1) I finally weigh less than my honey. It's only a few pounds, but it still feels good. We're a foot apart in height, so I'm still far more overweight than he is, but I am still happy.
2) I can fit comfortably in his shirts. Waaaaaay back in the beginning of writing this blog, I mentioned that one of my girly goals was to be able to wear one of his shirts to bed if I felt like it. I can!
3) Ran into some old coworkers that I haven't seen in a couple years. They kept going on about thin my face was and that I looked great. That's a pretty awesome pick-me-up. :)
~*~*~*~*~
Okay, this is unrelated to my weight loss, but I have to put it down so I don't forget...
Last Friday, my honey and I decided to go to the drive in theater. We stopped at a gas station with a Subway in it on the way, to have something to eat. I ordered and paid for my sandwich first because Travis wanted to fill the car and order his own.
I was standing by the gas station door, waiting for Travis to finish paying for his sub, when the guy next to him passed out cold and hit his head on the cement floor! It was such a gross, loud noise (probably louder now, in my memory, than it really was). Of course, everyone just stood there for a second, in shock about what just happened.
Finally, we all start moving. I came forward and said not to move him. I mentioned I'd worked in an emergency room for several years and that was something that they never want you to do when someone has fallen and hit their head. ... and then I paused, looked at everyone, held up my hands, and said, "but I am NOT a nurse." lol Just wanted to make that clear!
Anyway...
Two people called for an ambulance. I checked to see if the passed out guy's head was bleeding. I didn't find any blood on the ground around his head. As I was feeling around, his eyes popped open. Then, before we could say anything, he jumped up off the floor to a standing position.
He did have a small laceration on the back of his head. Nothing major, but he left a splotch of blood on the floor and a little on his neck. It either split open from the impact or one of the tiles cut him.
His coloring was still very green/gray and I was concerned he'd go down again. The gas station attendant and I walked him to a booth and I sat with him while we waited for the ambulance. I kept talking to him to keep him awake. Travis came over a chatted a bit too.
He said he was in a band and they'd been practicing all day with very little water. He figured he passed out from dehydration, which wouldn't have been surprising. We've been experiencing some wicked hot weather lately.
The thing he seemed most concerned about was that he didn't have insurance. I explained that most hospitals have programs to pay part or all of costs for people without insurance who really need emergency care. I told him he needed to have his head and neck checked out because he hit so hard on the ground...and I followed it up with another, "but I am NOT a nurse" comment.
It took about 10 minutes from the time he woke up for the ambulance to arrive. That's when Travis and I headed out. I knew, from experience, that the EMTs would do their very best to get him to go to the hospital for his own good. There was a possible neck injury and brain bleed from smacking on the cement ground. They take that very seriously.
We headed to the movies and were talking animatedly, thanks to the surge of adrenaline. It was hard to calm down, but eventually we did, though multiple times, we both said, "I sure hope he is okay."
I haven't seen any sad news about a death from at accident at Subway, so I'm confident that the guy good to go, even if he is sore.
Travis seems to still be upset with himself that he didn't catch the guy as he went down. I have explained time and time again that no one else expected that of him. I hate that he feels guilty. I wasn't up close when this happened, so I could see all of the people and what transpired. There was just no way for it to have happened like he thinks it should have. For wanting to have helped more, I give him hugs and kisses.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Dr. PeopleSkills would be so proud! The other day, I walked a total of about 80 minutes--10 min on break, 25 min on lunch break, and then 45 min after work with my mom.
Last night, I beat 80 minutes. My mom, Auntie T, and I went to the local Fair. We walked around for about 4 hours, checking things out, finding food (mostly for them), and shopping. My total for the day was over 17,500 steps. About 12,000 was walking around the Fair grounds. Was exhausting, but a great time!
I bought a very cute tie-dyed tank last night and am wearing it today. While admiring it in the mirror, I realized something...my collar bones are constantly on display now. They don't make occasional appearances when I turn just right. No, they are there all the time! Hell, a few months ago, I wasn't sure I actually had any. lol
Also, my scale has been stuck for quite some time. All of my recent walking must have finally broke the plateau, because I lost 2.5 pounds as of this morning. Yay!
It's getting super hot again outside. We had a brief reprieve from the super steamy weather, but, today, the heat index is over 100 degrees. The actual temp is 93 degrees. This makes for awful and dangerous exercising weather. Monday will the the worst and then things will start to go back to the mid or low 80s.
I'm not going to have time for real exercise anyway, because we're prepping for a thrift sale all week. The sale is on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. I bet I'll burn just as many calories with all of the running around, lifting, etc.
Last night, I beat 80 minutes. My mom, Auntie T, and I went to the local Fair. We walked around for about 4 hours, checking things out, finding food (mostly for them), and shopping. My total for the day was over 17,500 steps. About 12,000 was walking around the Fair grounds. Was exhausting, but a great time!
I bought a very cute tie-dyed tank last night and am wearing it today. While admiring it in the mirror, I realized something...my collar bones are constantly on display now. They don't make occasional appearances when I turn just right. No, they are there all the time! Hell, a few months ago, I wasn't sure I actually had any. lol
Also, my scale has been stuck for quite some time. All of my recent walking must have finally broke the plateau, because I lost 2.5 pounds as of this morning. Yay!
It's getting super hot again outside. We had a brief reprieve from the super steamy weather, but, today, the heat index is over 100 degrees. The actual temp is 93 degrees. This makes for awful and dangerous exercising weather. Monday will the the worst and then things will start to go back to the mid or low 80s.
I'm not going to have time for real exercise anyway, because we're prepping for a thrift sale all week. The sale is on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. I bet I'll burn just as many calories with all of the running around, lifting, etc.
Monday, July 9, 2012
Oh, you want to see what a 100 lb loss does to upper arms?
If my arm is down, the upper arm skin actually hangs and covers my elbow. *blech!* Hate it. My arms were always extra big, so this isn't a surprise that I have all that sagging skin. I'm told some of it will shrink up in the next year, but I doubt that it will be enough because the inside of my arms are covered in stretchmarks. That part of my skin won't shrink much.
Now, the question is: how long do I wait before I consider having those Flying Squirrel/Grandma Wings clipped? Hmmm? I am thinking a year from now, giving the skin time to shrink as much as it will and for me to lose more weight/fat.
I'm not usually the first person to jump at the idea of plastic surgery, but, for this, it is something I would consider. My legs are saggy and so is my stomach, but no one but me and Travis see that. Travis is fine with how I am. My arms, however, are something that lots of people see. Makes me self conscious. What's the point of going through my GBP surgery if I make it near to my goal and still feel I need to hide myself? None.
Plus, it's really annoying having one's upper arm skin slap a breast when sweeping the floor.
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| Arm Blub 7/9/12 |
If my arm is down, the upper arm skin actually hangs and covers my elbow. *blech!* Hate it. My arms were always extra big, so this isn't a surprise that I have all that sagging skin. I'm told some of it will shrink up in the next year, but I doubt that it will be enough because the inside of my arms are covered in stretchmarks. That part of my skin won't shrink much.
Now, the question is: how long do I wait before I consider having those Flying Squirrel/Grandma Wings clipped? Hmmm? I am thinking a year from now, giving the skin time to shrink as much as it will and for me to lose more weight/fat.
I'm not usually the first person to jump at the idea of plastic surgery, but, for this, it is something I would consider. My legs are saggy and so is my stomach, but no one but me and Travis see that. Travis is fine with how I am. My arms, however, are something that lots of people see. Makes me self conscious. What's the point of going through my GBP surgery if I make it near to my goal and still feel I need to hide myself? None.
Plus, it's really annoying having one's upper arm skin slap a breast when sweeping the floor.
Lately, I haven't been doing well. I slacked off of tracking my food, eating unhealthy foods, and I wasn't exercising. That's not the way to keep from being 317 lbs again.
I just didn't have the ambition or the energy to do what needed to be done. I could name a bunch of factors and reasons, but would they be true or just excuses? Doesn't matter. I just need to hop back on the wagon. Thankfully, you fall ass-over-tea kettle off the wagon, it stops and waits for you to climb back on. I am working toward doing just that...finally.
What really got me motivated was when my honey pointed out that I was cheating a lot with foods I was previously avoiding--ice cream, pasta, etc. He wasn't mean, just stated a fact. At first, I was defensive, but that's because it was true and I was hurt that I'd slipped so much that he'd noticed. I knew I'd slipped and was struggling to get my behavior back in line where it should be. He was the push I needed to say to myself, "this is not acceptable."
It was Saturday when he said he'd noticed my eating had gone off course.
Sunday, I decided to go for a walk, which was 40 minutes long and 1.78 miles. Not bad, since I had not been on a walk in about a month. We had two weeks of really hot weather here that prevented much outside activity, but the other two weeks were all my fault. The walk aggravated my old tendinitis issues in my right hip, but I figure that just means the tendon was under worked and then overworked, so I need to keep it stretched and walking far more regularly.
Today, Monday, I have tracked all of my food and am currently 120 calories under my 1,000 allowed calories (per Nutritionist) and I am about to go for a walk with my mom. That will last at least 40 minutes.
The track and the walking are both "steps" in the right direction. :)
I just didn't have the ambition or the energy to do what needed to be done. I could name a bunch of factors and reasons, but would they be true or just excuses? Doesn't matter. I just need to hop back on the wagon. Thankfully, you fall ass-over-tea kettle off the wagon, it stops and waits for you to climb back on. I am working toward doing just that...finally.
What really got me motivated was when my honey pointed out that I was cheating a lot with foods I was previously avoiding--ice cream, pasta, etc. He wasn't mean, just stated a fact. At first, I was defensive, but that's because it was true and I was hurt that I'd slipped so much that he'd noticed. I knew I'd slipped and was struggling to get my behavior back in line where it should be. He was the push I needed to say to myself, "this is not acceptable."
It was Saturday when he said he'd noticed my eating had gone off course.
Sunday, I decided to go for a walk, which was 40 minutes long and 1.78 miles. Not bad, since I had not been on a walk in about a month. We had two weeks of really hot weather here that prevented much outside activity, but the other two weeks were all my fault. The walk aggravated my old tendinitis issues in my right hip, but I figure that just means the tendon was under worked and then overworked, so I need to keep it stretched and walking far more regularly.
Today, Monday, I have tracked all of my food and am currently 120 calories under my 1,000 allowed calories (per Nutritionist) and I am about to go for a walk with my mom. That will last at least 40 minutes.
The track and the walking are both "steps" in the right direction. :)
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Popcorn, Take 1!
I haven't had popcorn since before my surgery, so at least six months ago. For whatever reason, lately I want it (I blame it on the new job where the breakroom always smells like it). Redenbacher's has a 94% fat free butter popcorn and I bought it tonight.
Since I haven't had it post-op, I didn't want the trial run to be while I was at work. So, I'm testing out whether I can tolerate it now. Wish me luck!
Taste wise, it's a little dry, but it's also not dripping in extra butter like I use to make it. Taste isn't bad. I can taste a hint of butter, which is all I need.
Can't have the best of both worlds with food. I can have a modified version and keep my calorie count in check or I can have it just as I did before along with the weight/health troubles. I'll stick with the first option, TYVM!
Besides, if I can eat and keep it down, there are tons of no cal/low cal powders that can be put on to add flavors. We modify our protein shakes to make them as good as possible. I say, "why not popcorn?!" :P
ETA: I forgot to reveal the results of my pcorn experiment. It stayed down just fine--no pain, funny feelings, vomiting, or anything negative. Now, the problem is that I have to keep my portions to a cup, not all 7.5 in the bag! lol
Since I haven't had it post-op, I didn't want the trial run to be while I was at work. So, I'm testing out whether I can tolerate it now. Wish me luck!
Taste wise, it's a little dry, but it's also not dripping in extra butter like I use to make it. Taste isn't bad. I can taste a hint of butter, which is all I need.
Can't have the best of both worlds with food. I can have a modified version and keep my calorie count in check or I can have it just as I did before along with the weight/health troubles. I'll stick with the first option, TYVM!
Besides, if I can eat and keep it down, there are tons of no cal/low cal powders that can be put on to add flavors. We modify our protein shakes to make them as good as possible. I say, "why not popcorn?!" :P
ETA: I forgot to reveal the results of my pcorn experiment. It stayed down just fine--no pain, funny feelings, vomiting, or anything negative. Now, the problem is that I have to keep my portions to a cup, not all 7.5 in the bag! lol
Sunday, July 1, 2012
I remember why I avoid carbs: I love them like a toddler loves sugar!
My honey is recovering from his Thursday tonsillectomy and doesn't find many foods comfortable to eat. He's pretty much living on instant mashed potatoes, popscicles, ice cream and cottage cheese.
I really want him to get past this stage, because I find it beyond hard to resist those potatoes. I absolutely love instant potatoes. Don't know what it is about them, but I adore them. Nummy.
I've kept my portions small when I have stolen some from The Patient, but I want more. It's a massive craving right now. I'm actually writing this as a something to do with my hands instead of raiding the pan of 'tatoes.
My councelor would be thrilled that I took measures to distract myself from having more and my nutritionist would be upset that I had any. Can't please everybody all the time, I guess. :P
On a side note, related only to the tonsillectomy, Travis asked that "Soft Kitty" be sung to him, since he's not feeling well. I agree and sang to him, because I am, in fact, an excellent sorta-wife.
My honey is recovering from his Thursday tonsillectomy and doesn't find many foods comfortable to eat. He's pretty much living on instant mashed potatoes, popscicles, ice cream and cottage cheese.
I really want him to get past this stage, because I find it beyond hard to resist those potatoes. I absolutely love instant potatoes. Don't know what it is about them, but I adore them. Nummy.
I've kept my portions small when I have stolen some from The Patient, but I want more. It's a massive craving right now. I'm actually writing this as a something to do with my hands instead of raiding the pan of 'tatoes.
My councelor would be thrilled that I took measures to distract myself from having more and my nutritionist would be upset that I had any. Can't please everybody all the time, I guess. :P
On a side note, related only to the tonsillectomy, Travis asked that "Soft Kitty" be sung to him, since he's not feeling well. I agree and sang to him, because I am, in fact, an excellent sorta-wife.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Life's been rather hectic lately. *insert crazy, frazzled face*
Started my new job on Monday. I went from working nights three days a week to five days of daytime 8 hour shifts. Quite a change. Now, I'm trying to come up with a plan for eating on this new schedule.
I have veered off track on my food lately. I know I am eating too much and I am not tracking enough. I don't find that acceptable (and I know Dr. PeopleSkills won't when I see him on Thursday), but I was so overwhelmed by my old job and the upcoming new job. Things just got out of control.
My plan is to test things out for a week or two and see if I can settle into something for an eating schedule. Things are going to be hectic for a bit while I learn to be a "Day Walker". By the end of the two weeks, I want to have a routine down for meal times. Then, I'll really focus on getting my food intake under control and written down. I'm going to keep an eye on the intake anyway, but, as long as I don't binge, I'm not going to make that my main problem to solve just yet. I'm prioritizing, rather than trying to take it all on at one time.
Once I get those two issues rolling, I'm going to work on increasing my exercise. I took a walk today on my lunch break and it felt so good. I will keep that up. Problem is, by the time I get home, I'm really tired. That's due to the new job and flipping nights to days. It will sort out soon. Once it does, I hope to start doing my cardio exercise DVDs, even if only for a few minutes at first. I'm aiming for at least a trial run at the DVDs by the first weekend in July. Gives me time to get some energy back and not enough time to get lazy and "forget" that I'd planned to up my exercise.
Between my new job and my honey's tonsillectomy on Thursday, life's running at a fast and furious clip. That's taxing but, I look at it this way: I am running right along with it, mostly keeping up, which is better than watching it from the couch like I did before.
Started my new job on Monday. I went from working nights three days a week to five days of daytime 8 hour shifts. Quite a change. Now, I'm trying to come up with a plan for eating on this new schedule.
I have veered off track on my food lately. I know I am eating too much and I am not tracking enough. I don't find that acceptable (and I know Dr. PeopleSkills won't when I see him on Thursday), but I was so overwhelmed by my old job and the upcoming new job. Things just got out of control.
My plan is to test things out for a week or two and see if I can settle into something for an eating schedule. Things are going to be hectic for a bit while I learn to be a "Day Walker". By the end of the two weeks, I want to have a routine down for meal times. Then, I'll really focus on getting my food intake under control and written down. I'm going to keep an eye on the intake anyway, but, as long as I don't binge, I'm not going to make that my main problem to solve just yet. I'm prioritizing, rather than trying to take it all on at one time.
Once I get those two issues rolling, I'm going to work on increasing my exercise. I took a walk today on my lunch break and it felt so good. I will keep that up. Problem is, by the time I get home, I'm really tired. That's due to the new job and flipping nights to days. It will sort out soon. Once it does, I hope to start doing my cardio exercise DVDs, even if only for a few minutes at first. I'm aiming for at least a trial run at the DVDs by the first weekend in July. Gives me time to get some energy back and not enough time to get lazy and "forget" that I'd planned to up my exercise.
Between my new job and my honey's tonsillectomy on Thursday, life's running at a fast and furious clip. That's taxing but, I look at it this way: I am running right along with it, mostly keeping up, which is better than watching it from the couch like I did before.
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Downside to losing over 100 pounds very quickly: Skin doesn't retract as fast as the weight loss and loose skin can get caught in stuff. I just pinched my saggy upper arm skin between my high work desk and the arm of my computer chair! Sweet mother, that hurt!
...and it's rather funny to me too. Just another experience I wouldn't have had if life had gone a little differently and I wouldn't have had the surgery.
...and it's rather funny to me too. Just another experience I wouldn't have had if life had gone a little differently and I wouldn't have had the surgery.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
6 Month Post-Op Appt Ramble
My six month surg-iversary was on Friday, June 15. Yay! :)
Had a visit with my Internal Med guy, Dr. H, for my 6 month follow up. He was happy with my weight loss progress. By his record--which I argue with--I have lost 75 pounds since surgery. I maintain it is 83 pounds! Discrepancies aside, that's still pretty good for a 6 month loss.
My cholesterol and other such important labs were good. I'm to continue as usual with vitamins and eating well.
My thyroid was off (meaning, I'm not getting enough med), but, honestly, that's not surprising. I take that when I take my anxiety med in the morning. I've missed several doses of the anxiety med because it makes me drowsy and I remembered to take it too late. If I did take it late, I'd be very tired and that's hard when working in an emergency room, even as non-patient care staff.
I switch to a regular, 9-5 office job on Monday. At that time, I think I'll be in a better place to schedule pills and meals. Well, I hope so, since that was the whole reason I took the job.
I'm still tired all the time, but that's due to having only 1,000 calories a day (per nutritionist, and just for now) and because I keep missing those anxiety meds. I'm having tired withdrawal symptoms, as Dr. H explained to me at our last appointment.
Per that previous conversation, we opted to move me off of my current anxiety med, Paxil, to a new one (don't remember the name). I take both for the next week and then drop Paxil completely. It will be soooo nice not having that pill add to my constant feeling of tired!
Prior to and after my surgery, no one told me how much weight I should lose in what time frame. I never knew if I was on the right track, going too slow, going too fast, etc. Dr. H actually told me what he expects of me in the next six months. I'm happy about that. I like having a goal/plan.
He said that my weight loss will slow, which it already has, now that I am further away from my surgery and getting more calories than I was initially. He said walking is excellent, but my metabolism is going to need a boost at this point, so I should do some cardio exercise 2x a week.
Also, he said that another 75 (83!) pound loss by the one-year surg-iversary is not expected, nor a healthy goal. He feels a 25 pound loss in that time frame (6 more months) would be safe and attainable. That's approximately 1 pound a week. I plan to try to do 2 pounds a week, but, over all, I'm going to be happy as long as I make the 25 lb mark. Anything greater is a bonus!
"Maybe the most any of us can expect of ourselves isn't perfection but progress." ~ Michelle Burford
Had a visit with my Internal Med guy, Dr. H, for my 6 month follow up. He was happy with my weight loss progress. By his record--which I argue with--I have lost 75 pounds since surgery. I maintain it is 83 pounds! Discrepancies aside, that's still pretty good for a 6 month loss.
My cholesterol and other such important labs were good. I'm to continue as usual with vitamins and eating well.
My thyroid was off (meaning, I'm not getting enough med), but, honestly, that's not surprising. I take that when I take my anxiety med in the morning. I've missed several doses of the anxiety med because it makes me drowsy and I remembered to take it too late. If I did take it late, I'd be very tired and that's hard when working in an emergency room, even as non-patient care staff.
I switch to a regular, 9-5 office job on Monday. At that time, I think I'll be in a better place to schedule pills and meals. Well, I hope so, since that was the whole reason I took the job.
I'm still tired all the time, but that's due to having only 1,000 calories a day (per nutritionist, and just for now) and because I keep missing those anxiety meds. I'm having tired withdrawal symptoms, as Dr. H explained to me at our last appointment.
Per that previous conversation, we opted to move me off of my current anxiety med, Paxil, to a new one (don't remember the name). I take both for the next week and then drop Paxil completely. It will be soooo nice not having that pill add to my constant feeling of tired!
Prior to and after my surgery, no one told me how much weight I should lose in what time frame. I never knew if I was on the right track, going too slow, going too fast, etc. Dr. H actually told me what he expects of me in the next six months. I'm happy about that. I like having a goal/plan.
He said that my weight loss will slow, which it already has, now that I am further away from my surgery and getting more calories than I was initially. He said walking is excellent, but my metabolism is going to need a boost at this point, so I should do some cardio exercise 2x a week.
Also, he said that another 75 (83!) pound loss by the one-year surg-iversary is not expected, nor a healthy goal. He feels a 25 pound loss in that time frame (6 more months) would be safe and attainable. That's approximately 1 pound a week. I plan to try to do 2 pounds a week, but, over all, I'm going to be happy as long as I make the 25 lb mark. Anything greater is a bonus!
"Maybe the most any of us can expect of ourselves isn't perfection but progress." ~ Michelle Burford
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
So far, my car has broken down and I accidentally sliced off part of my left pinky fingernail while shaving my legs (my lack of coordination is legendary). I'm kind of afraid to touch or do anything today for fear of what else might happen.
On a happier note, I am just two days away from my six month post op surg-iversary! Goodness, six months sounds so much longer than it has felt.
I'm still learning about myself emotionally, how to handle my Frankensteined system, and discovering long hidden body parts (guess what! I found a collar bone the other day and felt a hip bone last week!). I think most of that will be a life long process and I welcome it. Bet life gets boring if you figure it all out.
Six months ago, I wouldn't have even imagined that, today, I would be less than two weeks from starting a new job--and a daytime job at that. I wouldn't have had any idea that I would lose 83 pounds between then and now. Finally, surprise!, I can--and enjoy--walking two miles, when I hated walking to the mail box six months ago.
Life really is a roller coaster. Who knows what is around the next bend? I'm looking forward to finding out when I get there.
On a happier note, I am just two days away from my six month post op surg-iversary! Goodness, six months sounds so much longer than it has felt.
I'm still learning about myself emotionally, how to handle my Frankensteined system, and discovering long hidden body parts (guess what! I found a collar bone the other day and felt a hip bone last week!). I think most of that will be a life long process and I welcome it. Bet life gets boring if you figure it all out.
Six months ago, I wouldn't have even imagined that, today, I would be less than two weeks from starting a new job--and a daytime job at that. I wouldn't have had any idea that I would lose 83 pounds between then and now. Finally, surprise!, I can--and enjoy--walking two miles, when I hated walking to the mail box six months ago.
Life really is a roller coaster. Who knows what is around the next bend? I'm looking forward to finding out when I get there.
Monday, June 4, 2012
You may or may not remember that I have a less than wonderful relationship with my dad. He's been absent for most of my life and, when he is around, he has moments of massive tactlessness, both alcohol related and non-alcohol related.
We played phone tag early this year for a bit. I eventually decided to call my effort "good enough" and gave up. I wasn't upset that we hadn't connected, truthfully.
Well, that changed on Sunday.
My mom asked me to come pick her up from the VFW that her boyfriend goes to. She was leaving her vehicle with him to have it fixed, so she needed a ride home.
I know my dad goes to that same VFW, so I jokingly said to her on the phone, "is Dad going to be there? Can we get a warning system in place, just in case?" Stupid me, I jinxed myself!
I walked in the building and there was my dad. It was the first time I have been face-to-face with him in about 7 years. Yippee.
Okay, it could have been so much worse, I'll admit it. Since I didn't know he was going to be there, there was no build up of dread about how awkward it was going to be. He wasn't drunk, though working his way there. Also, I had my mom there as a buffer.
Before I arrived, Dad must have asked my mom about me and what I've been up to. From what I heard when I walked in, it was obvious that she'd just told him about my GBP surgery.
That actually surprised me, because I thought that her boyfriend, who is now a friend of my dad's, would have told him before. Mom's boyfriend came to see me in the hospital, for goodness sakes. I know he and Dad talk about me occasionally because that's when Dad whines that I don't ever call him and Mom's boyfriend nags me about it.
Dad asked me questions about my life and about my surgery. He did say he was proud of me for making the decision. Thumbs up to him for such a statement. Of course, he also asked me in the middle of a tavern what my highest weight was. He's had several wives. He should know better than to ask a woman that, in public no less! lol He followed it up with saying that, if I am lucky, I'll lose as much as he did...totally serious, while patting his big beer belly. <--God had a sense of humor when He chose my father.
Mom had to leave to go pack for a business trip, so we didn't stay more than a half hour or 45 minutes. That suited me fine. Kept the visit with Dad short, minimizing weirdness.
No doubt, he'll redouble his efforts to get together with my S.O. and me for dinner now. I'm okay with that though, because there won't have been a 7 year gap since I'd seen him last. The longer I go without seeing him, the weirder it is to interact with him.
In other news...
I broke my plateau! I weighed myself on Thursday night and showed a 0.8 lb loss, but I didn't really feel that was breaking anything, since I can gain that by drinking a liter of water. However, I weighed myself tonight and I have lost 4.2 more pounds.
That puts my current weight at 214.3 pounds. Appox 83 pounds lost since my surgery on December 15, 2011, and a grand total of about 103 pounds lost since April 2011. That's right, I hit the 100 pound loss mark!!
Funny enough, I didn't even realize that until a friend on MFP pointed it out. I was more focused on the fact that I finally started losing weight--any weight--again.
I wonder if I weigh less than my S.O. yet on our scale. . . I'll have to find out.
We played phone tag early this year for a bit. I eventually decided to call my effort "good enough" and gave up. I wasn't upset that we hadn't connected, truthfully.
Well, that changed on Sunday.
My mom asked me to come pick her up from the VFW that her boyfriend goes to. She was leaving her vehicle with him to have it fixed, so she needed a ride home.
I know my dad goes to that same VFW, so I jokingly said to her on the phone, "is Dad going to be there? Can we get a warning system in place, just in case?" Stupid me, I jinxed myself!
I walked in the building and there was my dad. It was the first time I have been face-to-face with him in about 7 years. Yippee.
Okay, it could have been so much worse, I'll admit it. Since I didn't know he was going to be there, there was no build up of dread about how awkward it was going to be. He wasn't drunk, though working his way there. Also, I had my mom there as a buffer.
Before I arrived, Dad must have asked my mom about me and what I've been up to. From what I heard when I walked in, it was obvious that she'd just told him about my GBP surgery.
That actually surprised me, because I thought that her boyfriend, who is now a friend of my dad's, would have told him before. Mom's boyfriend came to see me in the hospital, for goodness sakes. I know he and Dad talk about me occasionally because that's when Dad whines that I don't ever call him and Mom's boyfriend nags me about it.
Dad asked me questions about my life and about my surgery. He did say he was proud of me for making the decision. Thumbs up to him for such a statement. Of course, he also asked me in the middle of a tavern what my highest weight was. He's had several wives. He should know better than to ask a woman that, in public no less! lol He followed it up with saying that, if I am lucky, I'll lose as much as he did...totally serious, while patting his big beer belly. <--God had a sense of humor when He chose my father.
Mom had to leave to go pack for a business trip, so we didn't stay more than a half hour or 45 minutes. That suited me fine. Kept the visit with Dad short, minimizing weirdness.
No doubt, he'll redouble his efforts to get together with my S.O. and me for dinner now. I'm okay with that though, because there won't have been a 7 year gap since I'd seen him last. The longer I go without seeing him, the weirder it is to interact with him.
In other news...
I broke my plateau! I weighed myself on Thursday night and showed a 0.8 lb loss, but I didn't really feel that was breaking anything, since I can gain that by drinking a liter of water. However, I weighed myself tonight and I have lost 4.2 more pounds.
That puts my current weight at 214.3 pounds. Appox 83 pounds lost since my surgery on December 15, 2011, and a grand total of about 103 pounds lost since April 2011. That's right, I hit the 100 pound loss mark!!
Funny enough, I didn't even realize that until a friend on MFP pointed it out. I was more focused on the fact that I finally started losing weight--any weight--again.
I wonder if I weigh less than my S.O. yet on our scale. . . I'll have to find out.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
The Panty Problem that isn't a Problem
As I've whined about several times, I haven't lost weight in nearly three weeks.
Even though I'm upset by the plateau, I have kept to walking 30 - 45 minutes a few times a week, plus some 15 minute walks during my breaks at work. Well, obviously my body is changing, even if my weight isn't. I should have been doing my measurements and I wouldn't have been so upset about the stalled weight (maybe I would have anyway, since my anxiety was so high).
Travis frequently grabs my backside and says, "yep, getting smaller and rounder!" So, that's one confirmation of the physical changes. Now, today, my underwear keep sliding down my butt under my scrub pants! I look like a fool because I keep having to pull them back up. I look even more like a fool because I have a big, stupid grin on my face.
This means a few things:
1) I need new, smaller undies
2) I need suspenders for my undies until the new ones can be purchased. (isn't that a sexy picture?!)
3) I will keep up my walking.
Even though I'm upset by the plateau, I have kept to walking 30 - 45 minutes a few times a week, plus some 15 minute walks during my breaks at work. Well, obviously my body is changing, even if my weight isn't. I should have been doing my measurements and I wouldn't have been so upset about the stalled weight (maybe I would have anyway, since my anxiety was so high).
Travis frequently grabs my backside and says, "yep, getting smaller and rounder!" So, that's one confirmation of the physical changes. Now, today, my underwear keep sliding down my butt under my scrub pants! I look like a fool because I keep having to pull them back up. I look even more like a fool because I have a big, stupid grin on my face.
This means a few things:
1) I need new, smaller undies
2) I need suspenders for my undies until the new ones can be purchased. (isn't that a sexy picture?!)
3) I will keep up my walking.
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
I currently weigh 219.3 pounds. At 5' 2", that puts my body mass index at 40.1. At 40, I will be considered just regular ol' "obese" instead of "morbidly obese".
Wouldn't you know it, my weight has stalled for the last three weeks. *laugh* I've been stuck just over in Morbidly Obese Land by 0.1. This girl can't catch a break, I swear!
My head is in a somewhat better place than it was when I posted the other day. I had the holiday weekend off of work and enjoyed our annual extended family picnic. Got some sun, played with babies, lost at cards, and chatted with great people. That picnic did wonderful things for my stress level.
I am still struggling with being tired and I still have some really negative thoughts, but it's better than it was and every day is a new day. Once in that mindset, it takes time to fully get back out.
I have a little more perspective, which I really wasn't able to get the other day. I knew a major part of my problem was that I was unable to back up out of the middle of the storm in my head that was overwhelming me and get a good view of what was really going on. Some days are just like that, though, thankfully, not many.
Now, I'm able to see the issues and break them down into more manageable parts, instead of just seeing this huge thing that I somehow needed to deal with.
Wouldn't you know it, my weight has stalled for the last three weeks. *laugh* I've been stuck just over in Morbidly Obese Land by 0.1. This girl can't catch a break, I swear!
My head is in a somewhat better place than it was when I posted the other day. I had the holiday weekend off of work and enjoyed our annual extended family picnic. Got some sun, played with babies, lost at cards, and chatted with great people. That picnic did wonderful things for my stress level.
I am still struggling with being tired and I still have some really negative thoughts, but it's better than it was and every day is a new day. Once in that mindset, it takes time to fully get back out.
I have a little more perspective, which I really wasn't able to get the other day. I knew a major part of my problem was that I was unable to back up out of the middle of the storm in my head that was overwhelming me and get a good view of what was really going on. Some days are just like that, though, thankfully, not many.
Now, I'm able to see the issues and break them down into more manageable parts, instead of just seeing this huge thing that I somehow needed to deal with.
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