Some victories to write about!
1) I finally weigh less than my honey. It's only a few pounds, but it still feels good. We're a foot apart in height, so I'm still far more overweight than he is, but I am still happy.
2) I can fit comfortably in his shirts. Waaaaaay back in the beginning of writing this blog, I mentioned that one of my girly goals was to be able to wear one of his shirts to bed if I felt like it. I can!
3) Ran into some old coworkers that I haven't seen in a couple years. They kept going on about thin my face was and that I looked great. That's a pretty awesome pick-me-up. :)
~*~*~*~*~
Okay, this is unrelated to my weight loss, but I have to put it down so I don't forget...
Last Friday, my honey and I decided to go to the drive in theater. We stopped at a gas station with a Subway in it on the way, to have something to eat. I ordered and paid for my sandwich first because Travis wanted to fill the car and order his own.
I was standing by the gas station door, waiting for Travis to finish paying for his sub, when the guy next to him passed out cold and hit his head on the cement floor! It was such a gross, loud noise (probably louder now, in my memory, than it really was). Of course, everyone just stood there for a second, in shock about what just happened.
Finally, we all start moving. I came forward and said not to move him. I mentioned I'd worked in an emergency room for several years and that was something that they never want you to do when someone has fallen and hit their head. ... and then I paused, looked at everyone, held up my hands, and said, "but I am NOT a nurse." lol Just wanted to make that clear!
Anyway...
Two people called for an ambulance. I checked to see if the passed out guy's head was bleeding. I didn't find any blood on the ground around his head. As I was feeling around, his eyes popped open. Then, before we could say anything, he jumped up off the floor to a standing position.
He did have a small laceration on the back of his head. Nothing major, but he left a splotch of blood on the floor and a little on his neck. It either split open from the impact or one of the tiles cut him.
His coloring was still very green/gray and I was concerned he'd go down again. The gas station attendant and I walked him to a booth and I sat with him while we waited for the ambulance. I kept talking to him to keep him awake. Travis came over a chatted a bit too.
He said he was in a band and they'd been practicing all day with very little water. He figured he passed out from dehydration, which wouldn't have been surprising. We've been experiencing some wicked hot weather lately.
The thing he seemed most concerned about was that he didn't have insurance. I explained that most hospitals have programs to pay part or all of costs for people without insurance who really need emergency care. I told him he needed to have his head and neck checked out because he hit so hard on the ground...and I followed it up with another, "but I am NOT a nurse" comment.
It took about 10 minutes from the time he woke up for the ambulance to arrive. That's when Travis and I headed out. I knew, from experience, that the EMTs would do their very best to get him to go to the hospital for his own good. There was a possible neck injury and brain bleed from smacking on the cement ground. They take that very seriously.
We headed to the movies and were talking animatedly, thanks to the surge of adrenaline. It was hard to calm down, but eventually we did, though multiple times, we both said, "I sure hope he is okay."
I haven't seen any sad news about a death from at accident at Subway, so I'm confident that the guy good to go, even if he is sore.
Travis seems to still be upset with himself that he didn't catch the guy as he went down. I have explained time and time again that no one else expected that of him. I hate that he feels guilty. I wasn't up close when this happened, so I could see all of the people and what transpired. There was just no way for it to have happened like he thinks it should have. For wanting to have helped more, I give him hugs and kisses.
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Dr. PeopleSkills would be so proud! The other day, I walked a total of about 80 minutes--10 min on break, 25 min on lunch break, and then 45 min after work with my mom.
Last night, I beat 80 minutes. My mom, Auntie T, and I went to the local Fair. We walked around for about 4 hours, checking things out, finding food (mostly for them), and shopping. My total for the day was over 17,500 steps. About 12,000 was walking around the Fair grounds. Was exhausting, but a great time!
I bought a very cute tie-dyed tank last night and am wearing it today. While admiring it in the mirror, I realized something...my collar bones are constantly on display now. They don't make occasional appearances when I turn just right. No, they are there all the time! Hell, a few months ago, I wasn't sure I actually had any. lol
Also, my scale has been stuck for quite some time. All of my recent walking must have finally broke the plateau, because I lost 2.5 pounds as of this morning. Yay!
It's getting super hot again outside. We had a brief reprieve from the super steamy weather, but, today, the heat index is over 100 degrees. The actual temp is 93 degrees. This makes for awful and dangerous exercising weather. Monday will the the worst and then things will start to go back to the mid or low 80s.
I'm not going to have time for real exercise anyway, because we're prepping for a thrift sale all week. The sale is on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. I bet I'll burn just as many calories with all of the running around, lifting, etc.
Last night, I beat 80 minutes. My mom, Auntie T, and I went to the local Fair. We walked around for about 4 hours, checking things out, finding food (mostly for them), and shopping. My total for the day was over 17,500 steps. About 12,000 was walking around the Fair grounds. Was exhausting, but a great time!
I bought a very cute tie-dyed tank last night and am wearing it today. While admiring it in the mirror, I realized something...my collar bones are constantly on display now. They don't make occasional appearances when I turn just right. No, they are there all the time! Hell, a few months ago, I wasn't sure I actually had any. lol
Also, my scale has been stuck for quite some time. All of my recent walking must have finally broke the plateau, because I lost 2.5 pounds as of this morning. Yay!
It's getting super hot again outside. We had a brief reprieve from the super steamy weather, but, today, the heat index is over 100 degrees. The actual temp is 93 degrees. This makes for awful and dangerous exercising weather. Monday will the the worst and then things will start to go back to the mid or low 80s.
I'm not going to have time for real exercise anyway, because we're prepping for a thrift sale all week. The sale is on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. I bet I'll burn just as many calories with all of the running around, lifting, etc.
Monday, July 9, 2012
Oh, you want to see what a 100 lb loss does to upper arms?
If my arm is down, the upper arm skin actually hangs and covers my elbow. *blech!* Hate it. My arms were always extra big, so this isn't a surprise that I have all that sagging skin. I'm told some of it will shrink up in the next year, but I doubt that it will be enough because the inside of my arms are covered in stretchmarks. That part of my skin won't shrink much.
Now, the question is: how long do I wait before I consider having those Flying Squirrel/Grandma Wings clipped? Hmmm? I am thinking a year from now, giving the skin time to shrink as much as it will and for me to lose more weight/fat.
I'm not usually the first person to jump at the idea of plastic surgery, but, for this, it is something I would consider. My legs are saggy and so is my stomach, but no one but me and Travis see that. Travis is fine with how I am. My arms, however, are something that lots of people see. Makes me self conscious. What's the point of going through my GBP surgery if I make it near to my goal and still feel I need to hide myself? None.
Plus, it's really annoying having one's upper arm skin slap a breast when sweeping the floor.
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| Arm Blub 7/9/12 |
If my arm is down, the upper arm skin actually hangs and covers my elbow. *blech!* Hate it. My arms were always extra big, so this isn't a surprise that I have all that sagging skin. I'm told some of it will shrink up in the next year, but I doubt that it will be enough because the inside of my arms are covered in stretchmarks. That part of my skin won't shrink much.
Now, the question is: how long do I wait before I consider having those Flying Squirrel/Grandma Wings clipped? Hmmm? I am thinking a year from now, giving the skin time to shrink as much as it will and for me to lose more weight/fat.
I'm not usually the first person to jump at the idea of plastic surgery, but, for this, it is something I would consider. My legs are saggy and so is my stomach, but no one but me and Travis see that. Travis is fine with how I am. My arms, however, are something that lots of people see. Makes me self conscious. What's the point of going through my GBP surgery if I make it near to my goal and still feel I need to hide myself? None.
Plus, it's really annoying having one's upper arm skin slap a breast when sweeping the floor.
Lately, I haven't been doing well. I slacked off of tracking my food, eating unhealthy foods, and I wasn't exercising. That's not the way to keep from being 317 lbs again.
I just didn't have the ambition or the energy to do what needed to be done. I could name a bunch of factors and reasons, but would they be true or just excuses? Doesn't matter. I just need to hop back on the wagon. Thankfully, you fall ass-over-tea kettle off the wagon, it stops and waits for you to climb back on. I am working toward doing just that...finally.
What really got me motivated was when my honey pointed out that I was cheating a lot with foods I was previously avoiding--ice cream, pasta, etc. He wasn't mean, just stated a fact. At first, I was defensive, but that's because it was true and I was hurt that I'd slipped so much that he'd noticed. I knew I'd slipped and was struggling to get my behavior back in line where it should be. He was the push I needed to say to myself, "this is not acceptable."
It was Saturday when he said he'd noticed my eating had gone off course.
Sunday, I decided to go for a walk, which was 40 minutes long and 1.78 miles. Not bad, since I had not been on a walk in about a month. We had two weeks of really hot weather here that prevented much outside activity, but the other two weeks were all my fault. The walk aggravated my old tendinitis issues in my right hip, but I figure that just means the tendon was under worked and then overworked, so I need to keep it stretched and walking far more regularly.
Today, Monday, I have tracked all of my food and am currently 120 calories under my 1,000 allowed calories (per Nutritionist) and I am about to go for a walk with my mom. That will last at least 40 minutes.
The track and the walking are both "steps" in the right direction. :)
I just didn't have the ambition or the energy to do what needed to be done. I could name a bunch of factors and reasons, but would they be true or just excuses? Doesn't matter. I just need to hop back on the wagon. Thankfully, you fall ass-over-tea kettle off the wagon, it stops and waits for you to climb back on. I am working toward doing just that...finally.
What really got me motivated was when my honey pointed out that I was cheating a lot with foods I was previously avoiding--ice cream, pasta, etc. He wasn't mean, just stated a fact. At first, I was defensive, but that's because it was true and I was hurt that I'd slipped so much that he'd noticed. I knew I'd slipped and was struggling to get my behavior back in line where it should be. He was the push I needed to say to myself, "this is not acceptable."
It was Saturday when he said he'd noticed my eating had gone off course.
Sunday, I decided to go for a walk, which was 40 minutes long and 1.78 miles. Not bad, since I had not been on a walk in about a month. We had two weeks of really hot weather here that prevented much outside activity, but the other two weeks were all my fault. The walk aggravated my old tendinitis issues in my right hip, but I figure that just means the tendon was under worked and then overworked, so I need to keep it stretched and walking far more regularly.
Today, Monday, I have tracked all of my food and am currently 120 calories under my 1,000 allowed calories (per Nutritionist) and I am about to go for a walk with my mom. That will last at least 40 minutes.
The track and the walking are both "steps" in the right direction. :)
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Popcorn, Take 1!
I haven't had popcorn since before my surgery, so at least six months ago. For whatever reason, lately I want it (I blame it on the new job where the breakroom always smells like it). Redenbacher's has a 94% fat free butter popcorn and I bought it tonight.
Since I haven't had it post-op, I didn't want the trial run to be while I was at work. So, I'm testing out whether I can tolerate it now. Wish me luck!
Taste wise, it's a little dry, but it's also not dripping in extra butter like I use to make it. Taste isn't bad. I can taste a hint of butter, which is all I need.
Can't have the best of both worlds with food. I can have a modified version and keep my calorie count in check or I can have it just as I did before along with the weight/health troubles. I'll stick with the first option, TYVM!
Besides, if I can eat and keep it down, there are tons of no cal/low cal powders that can be put on to add flavors. We modify our protein shakes to make them as good as possible. I say, "why not popcorn?!" :P
ETA: I forgot to reveal the results of my pcorn experiment. It stayed down just fine--no pain, funny feelings, vomiting, or anything negative. Now, the problem is that I have to keep my portions to a cup, not all 7.5 in the bag! lol
Since I haven't had it post-op, I didn't want the trial run to be while I was at work. So, I'm testing out whether I can tolerate it now. Wish me luck!
Taste wise, it's a little dry, but it's also not dripping in extra butter like I use to make it. Taste isn't bad. I can taste a hint of butter, which is all I need.
Can't have the best of both worlds with food. I can have a modified version and keep my calorie count in check or I can have it just as I did before along with the weight/health troubles. I'll stick with the first option, TYVM!
Besides, if I can eat and keep it down, there are tons of no cal/low cal powders that can be put on to add flavors. We modify our protein shakes to make them as good as possible. I say, "why not popcorn?!" :P
ETA: I forgot to reveal the results of my pcorn experiment. It stayed down just fine--no pain, funny feelings, vomiting, or anything negative. Now, the problem is that I have to keep my portions to a cup, not all 7.5 in the bag! lol
Sunday, July 1, 2012
I remember why I avoid carbs: I love them like a toddler loves sugar!
My honey is recovering from his Thursday tonsillectomy and doesn't find many foods comfortable to eat. He's pretty much living on instant mashed potatoes, popscicles, ice cream and cottage cheese.
I really want him to get past this stage, because I find it beyond hard to resist those potatoes. I absolutely love instant potatoes. Don't know what it is about them, but I adore them. Nummy.
I've kept my portions small when I have stolen some from The Patient, but I want more. It's a massive craving right now. I'm actually writing this as a something to do with my hands instead of raiding the pan of 'tatoes.
My councelor would be thrilled that I took measures to distract myself from having more and my nutritionist would be upset that I had any. Can't please everybody all the time, I guess. :P
On a side note, related only to the tonsillectomy, Travis asked that "Soft Kitty" be sung to him, since he's not feeling well. I agree and sang to him, because I am, in fact, an excellent sorta-wife.
My honey is recovering from his Thursday tonsillectomy and doesn't find many foods comfortable to eat. He's pretty much living on instant mashed potatoes, popscicles, ice cream and cottage cheese.
I really want him to get past this stage, because I find it beyond hard to resist those potatoes. I absolutely love instant potatoes. Don't know what it is about them, but I adore them. Nummy.
I've kept my portions small when I have stolen some from The Patient, but I want more. It's a massive craving right now. I'm actually writing this as a something to do with my hands instead of raiding the pan of 'tatoes.
My councelor would be thrilled that I took measures to distract myself from having more and my nutritionist would be upset that I had any. Can't please everybody all the time, I guess. :P
On a side note, related only to the tonsillectomy, Travis asked that "Soft Kitty" be sung to him, since he's not feeling well. I agree and sang to him, because I am, in fact, an excellent sorta-wife.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Life's been rather hectic lately. *insert crazy, frazzled face*
Started my new job on Monday. I went from working nights three days a week to five days of daytime 8 hour shifts. Quite a change. Now, I'm trying to come up with a plan for eating on this new schedule.
I have veered off track on my food lately. I know I am eating too much and I am not tracking enough. I don't find that acceptable (and I know Dr. PeopleSkills won't when I see him on Thursday), but I was so overwhelmed by my old job and the upcoming new job. Things just got out of control.
My plan is to test things out for a week or two and see if I can settle into something for an eating schedule. Things are going to be hectic for a bit while I learn to be a "Day Walker". By the end of the two weeks, I want to have a routine down for meal times. Then, I'll really focus on getting my food intake under control and written down. I'm going to keep an eye on the intake anyway, but, as long as I don't binge, I'm not going to make that my main problem to solve just yet. I'm prioritizing, rather than trying to take it all on at one time.
Once I get those two issues rolling, I'm going to work on increasing my exercise. I took a walk today on my lunch break and it felt so good. I will keep that up. Problem is, by the time I get home, I'm really tired. That's due to the new job and flipping nights to days. It will sort out soon. Once it does, I hope to start doing my cardio exercise DVDs, even if only for a few minutes at first. I'm aiming for at least a trial run at the DVDs by the first weekend in July. Gives me time to get some energy back and not enough time to get lazy and "forget" that I'd planned to up my exercise.
Between my new job and my honey's tonsillectomy on Thursday, life's running at a fast and furious clip. That's taxing but, I look at it this way: I am running right along with it, mostly keeping up, which is better than watching it from the couch like I did before.
Started my new job on Monday. I went from working nights three days a week to five days of daytime 8 hour shifts. Quite a change. Now, I'm trying to come up with a plan for eating on this new schedule.
I have veered off track on my food lately. I know I am eating too much and I am not tracking enough. I don't find that acceptable (and I know Dr. PeopleSkills won't when I see him on Thursday), but I was so overwhelmed by my old job and the upcoming new job. Things just got out of control.
My plan is to test things out for a week or two and see if I can settle into something for an eating schedule. Things are going to be hectic for a bit while I learn to be a "Day Walker". By the end of the two weeks, I want to have a routine down for meal times. Then, I'll really focus on getting my food intake under control and written down. I'm going to keep an eye on the intake anyway, but, as long as I don't binge, I'm not going to make that my main problem to solve just yet. I'm prioritizing, rather than trying to take it all on at one time.
Once I get those two issues rolling, I'm going to work on increasing my exercise. I took a walk today on my lunch break and it felt so good. I will keep that up. Problem is, by the time I get home, I'm really tired. That's due to the new job and flipping nights to days. It will sort out soon. Once it does, I hope to start doing my cardio exercise DVDs, even if only for a few minutes at first. I'm aiming for at least a trial run at the DVDs by the first weekend in July. Gives me time to get some energy back and not enough time to get lazy and "forget" that I'd planned to up my exercise.
Between my new job and my honey's tonsillectomy on Thursday, life's running at a fast and furious clip. That's taxing but, I look at it this way: I am running right along with it, mostly keeping up, which is better than watching it from the couch like I did before.
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Downside to losing over 100 pounds very quickly: Skin doesn't retract as fast as the weight loss and loose skin can get caught in stuff. I just pinched my saggy upper arm skin between my high work desk and the arm of my computer chair! Sweet mother, that hurt!
...and it's rather funny to me too. Just another experience I wouldn't have had if life had gone a little differently and I wouldn't have had the surgery.
...and it's rather funny to me too. Just another experience I wouldn't have had if life had gone a little differently and I wouldn't have had the surgery.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
6 Month Post-Op Appt Ramble
My six month surg-iversary was on Friday, June 15. Yay! :)
Had a visit with my Internal Med guy, Dr. H, for my 6 month follow up. He was happy with my weight loss progress. By his record--which I argue with--I have lost 75 pounds since surgery. I maintain it is 83 pounds! Discrepancies aside, that's still pretty good for a 6 month loss.
My cholesterol and other such important labs were good. I'm to continue as usual with vitamins and eating well.
My thyroid was off (meaning, I'm not getting enough med), but, honestly, that's not surprising. I take that when I take my anxiety med in the morning. I've missed several doses of the anxiety med because it makes me drowsy and I remembered to take it too late. If I did take it late, I'd be very tired and that's hard when working in an emergency room, even as non-patient care staff.
I switch to a regular, 9-5 office job on Monday. At that time, I think I'll be in a better place to schedule pills and meals. Well, I hope so, since that was the whole reason I took the job.
I'm still tired all the time, but that's due to having only 1,000 calories a day (per nutritionist, and just for now) and because I keep missing those anxiety meds. I'm having tired withdrawal symptoms, as Dr. H explained to me at our last appointment.
Per that previous conversation, we opted to move me off of my current anxiety med, Paxil, to a new one (don't remember the name). I take both for the next week and then drop Paxil completely. It will be soooo nice not having that pill add to my constant feeling of tired!
Prior to and after my surgery, no one told me how much weight I should lose in what time frame. I never knew if I was on the right track, going too slow, going too fast, etc. Dr. H actually told me what he expects of me in the next six months. I'm happy about that. I like having a goal/plan.
He said that my weight loss will slow, which it already has, now that I am further away from my surgery and getting more calories than I was initially. He said walking is excellent, but my metabolism is going to need a boost at this point, so I should do some cardio exercise 2x a week.
Also, he said that another 75 (83!) pound loss by the one-year surg-iversary is not expected, nor a healthy goal. He feels a 25 pound loss in that time frame (6 more months) would be safe and attainable. That's approximately 1 pound a week. I plan to try to do 2 pounds a week, but, over all, I'm going to be happy as long as I make the 25 lb mark. Anything greater is a bonus!
"Maybe the most any of us can expect of ourselves isn't perfection but progress." ~ Michelle Burford
Had a visit with my Internal Med guy, Dr. H, for my 6 month follow up. He was happy with my weight loss progress. By his record--which I argue with--I have lost 75 pounds since surgery. I maintain it is 83 pounds! Discrepancies aside, that's still pretty good for a 6 month loss.
My cholesterol and other such important labs were good. I'm to continue as usual with vitamins and eating well.
My thyroid was off (meaning, I'm not getting enough med), but, honestly, that's not surprising. I take that when I take my anxiety med in the morning. I've missed several doses of the anxiety med because it makes me drowsy and I remembered to take it too late. If I did take it late, I'd be very tired and that's hard when working in an emergency room, even as non-patient care staff.
I switch to a regular, 9-5 office job on Monday. At that time, I think I'll be in a better place to schedule pills and meals. Well, I hope so, since that was the whole reason I took the job.
I'm still tired all the time, but that's due to having only 1,000 calories a day (per nutritionist, and just for now) and because I keep missing those anxiety meds. I'm having tired withdrawal symptoms, as Dr. H explained to me at our last appointment.
Per that previous conversation, we opted to move me off of my current anxiety med, Paxil, to a new one (don't remember the name). I take both for the next week and then drop Paxil completely. It will be soooo nice not having that pill add to my constant feeling of tired!
Prior to and after my surgery, no one told me how much weight I should lose in what time frame. I never knew if I was on the right track, going too slow, going too fast, etc. Dr. H actually told me what he expects of me in the next six months. I'm happy about that. I like having a goal/plan.
He said that my weight loss will slow, which it already has, now that I am further away from my surgery and getting more calories than I was initially. He said walking is excellent, but my metabolism is going to need a boost at this point, so I should do some cardio exercise 2x a week.
Also, he said that another 75 (83!) pound loss by the one-year surg-iversary is not expected, nor a healthy goal. He feels a 25 pound loss in that time frame (6 more months) would be safe and attainable. That's approximately 1 pound a week. I plan to try to do 2 pounds a week, but, over all, I'm going to be happy as long as I make the 25 lb mark. Anything greater is a bonus!
"Maybe the most any of us can expect of ourselves isn't perfection but progress." ~ Michelle Burford
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
So far, my car has broken down and I accidentally sliced off part of my left pinky fingernail while shaving my legs (my lack of coordination is legendary). I'm kind of afraid to touch or do anything today for fear of what else might happen.
On a happier note, I am just two days away from my six month post op surg-iversary! Goodness, six months sounds so much longer than it has felt.
I'm still learning about myself emotionally, how to handle my Frankensteined system, and discovering long hidden body parts (guess what! I found a collar bone the other day and felt a hip bone last week!). I think most of that will be a life long process and I welcome it. Bet life gets boring if you figure it all out.
Six months ago, I wouldn't have even imagined that, today, I would be less than two weeks from starting a new job--and a daytime job at that. I wouldn't have had any idea that I would lose 83 pounds between then and now. Finally, surprise!, I can--and enjoy--walking two miles, when I hated walking to the mail box six months ago.
Life really is a roller coaster. Who knows what is around the next bend? I'm looking forward to finding out when I get there.
On a happier note, I am just two days away from my six month post op surg-iversary! Goodness, six months sounds so much longer than it has felt.
I'm still learning about myself emotionally, how to handle my Frankensteined system, and discovering long hidden body parts (guess what! I found a collar bone the other day and felt a hip bone last week!). I think most of that will be a life long process and I welcome it. Bet life gets boring if you figure it all out.
Six months ago, I wouldn't have even imagined that, today, I would be less than two weeks from starting a new job--and a daytime job at that. I wouldn't have had any idea that I would lose 83 pounds between then and now. Finally, surprise!, I can--and enjoy--walking two miles, when I hated walking to the mail box six months ago.
Life really is a roller coaster. Who knows what is around the next bend? I'm looking forward to finding out when I get there.
Monday, June 4, 2012
You may or may not remember that I have a less than wonderful relationship with my dad. He's been absent for most of my life and, when he is around, he has moments of massive tactlessness, both alcohol related and non-alcohol related.
We played phone tag early this year for a bit. I eventually decided to call my effort "good enough" and gave up. I wasn't upset that we hadn't connected, truthfully.
Well, that changed on Sunday.
My mom asked me to come pick her up from the VFW that her boyfriend goes to. She was leaving her vehicle with him to have it fixed, so she needed a ride home.
I know my dad goes to that same VFW, so I jokingly said to her on the phone, "is Dad going to be there? Can we get a warning system in place, just in case?" Stupid me, I jinxed myself!
I walked in the building and there was my dad. It was the first time I have been face-to-face with him in about 7 years. Yippee.
Okay, it could have been so much worse, I'll admit it. Since I didn't know he was going to be there, there was no build up of dread about how awkward it was going to be. He wasn't drunk, though working his way there. Also, I had my mom there as a buffer.
Before I arrived, Dad must have asked my mom about me and what I've been up to. From what I heard when I walked in, it was obvious that she'd just told him about my GBP surgery.
That actually surprised me, because I thought that her boyfriend, who is now a friend of my dad's, would have told him before. Mom's boyfriend came to see me in the hospital, for goodness sakes. I know he and Dad talk about me occasionally because that's when Dad whines that I don't ever call him and Mom's boyfriend nags me about it.
Dad asked me questions about my life and about my surgery. He did say he was proud of me for making the decision. Thumbs up to him for such a statement. Of course, he also asked me in the middle of a tavern what my highest weight was. He's had several wives. He should know better than to ask a woman that, in public no less! lol He followed it up with saying that, if I am lucky, I'll lose as much as he did...totally serious, while patting his big beer belly. <--God had a sense of humor when He chose my father.
Mom had to leave to go pack for a business trip, so we didn't stay more than a half hour or 45 minutes. That suited me fine. Kept the visit with Dad short, minimizing weirdness.
No doubt, he'll redouble his efforts to get together with my S.O. and me for dinner now. I'm okay with that though, because there won't have been a 7 year gap since I'd seen him last. The longer I go without seeing him, the weirder it is to interact with him.
In other news...
I broke my plateau! I weighed myself on Thursday night and showed a 0.8 lb loss, but I didn't really feel that was breaking anything, since I can gain that by drinking a liter of water. However, I weighed myself tonight and I have lost 4.2 more pounds.
That puts my current weight at 214.3 pounds. Appox 83 pounds lost since my surgery on December 15, 2011, and a grand total of about 103 pounds lost since April 2011. That's right, I hit the 100 pound loss mark!!
Funny enough, I didn't even realize that until a friend on MFP pointed it out. I was more focused on the fact that I finally started losing weight--any weight--again.
I wonder if I weigh less than my S.O. yet on our scale. . . I'll have to find out.
We played phone tag early this year for a bit. I eventually decided to call my effort "good enough" and gave up. I wasn't upset that we hadn't connected, truthfully.
Well, that changed on Sunday.
My mom asked me to come pick her up from the VFW that her boyfriend goes to. She was leaving her vehicle with him to have it fixed, so she needed a ride home.
I know my dad goes to that same VFW, so I jokingly said to her on the phone, "is Dad going to be there? Can we get a warning system in place, just in case?" Stupid me, I jinxed myself!
I walked in the building and there was my dad. It was the first time I have been face-to-face with him in about 7 years. Yippee.
Okay, it could have been so much worse, I'll admit it. Since I didn't know he was going to be there, there was no build up of dread about how awkward it was going to be. He wasn't drunk, though working his way there. Also, I had my mom there as a buffer.
Before I arrived, Dad must have asked my mom about me and what I've been up to. From what I heard when I walked in, it was obvious that she'd just told him about my GBP surgery.
That actually surprised me, because I thought that her boyfriend, who is now a friend of my dad's, would have told him before. Mom's boyfriend came to see me in the hospital, for goodness sakes. I know he and Dad talk about me occasionally because that's when Dad whines that I don't ever call him and Mom's boyfriend nags me about it.
Dad asked me questions about my life and about my surgery. He did say he was proud of me for making the decision. Thumbs up to him for such a statement. Of course, he also asked me in the middle of a tavern what my highest weight was. He's had several wives. He should know better than to ask a woman that, in public no less! lol He followed it up with saying that, if I am lucky, I'll lose as much as he did...totally serious, while patting his big beer belly. <--God had a sense of humor when He chose my father.
Mom had to leave to go pack for a business trip, so we didn't stay more than a half hour or 45 minutes. That suited me fine. Kept the visit with Dad short, minimizing weirdness.
No doubt, he'll redouble his efforts to get together with my S.O. and me for dinner now. I'm okay with that though, because there won't have been a 7 year gap since I'd seen him last. The longer I go without seeing him, the weirder it is to interact with him.
In other news...
I broke my plateau! I weighed myself on Thursday night and showed a 0.8 lb loss, but I didn't really feel that was breaking anything, since I can gain that by drinking a liter of water. However, I weighed myself tonight and I have lost 4.2 more pounds.
That puts my current weight at 214.3 pounds. Appox 83 pounds lost since my surgery on December 15, 2011, and a grand total of about 103 pounds lost since April 2011. That's right, I hit the 100 pound loss mark!!
Funny enough, I didn't even realize that until a friend on MFP pointed it out. I was more focused on the fact that I finally started losing weight--any weight--again.
I wonder if I weigh less than my S.O. yet on our scale. . . I'll have to find out.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
The Panty Problem that isn't a Problem
As I've whined about several times, I haven't lost weight in nearly three weeks.
Even though I'm upset by the plateau, I have kept to walking 30 - 45 minutes a few times a week, plus some 15 minute walks during my breaks at work. Well, obviously my body is changing, even if my weight isn't. I should have been doing my measurements and I wouldn't have been so upset about the stalled weight (maybe I would have anyway, since my anxiety was so high).
Travis frequently grabs my backside and says, "yep, getting smaller and rounder!" So, that's one confirmation of the physical changes. Now, today, my underwear keep sliding down my butt under my scrub pants! I look like a fool because I keep having to pull them back up. I look even more like a fool because I have a big, stupid grin on my face.
This means a few things:
1) I need new, smaller undies
2) I need suspenders for my undies until the new ones can be purchased. (isn't that a sexy picture?!)
3) I will keep up my walking.
Even though I'm upset by the plateau, I have kept to walking 30 - 45 minutes a few times a week, plus some 15 minute walks during my breaks at work. Well, obviously my body is changing, even if my weight isn't. I should have been doing my measurements and I wouldn't have been so upset about the stalled weight (maybe I would have anyway, since my anxiety was so high).
Travis frequently grabs my backside and says, "yep, getting smaller and rounder!" So, that's one confirmation of the physical changes. Now, today, my underwear keep sliding down my butt under my scrub pants! I look like a fool because I keep having to pull them back up. I look even more like a fool because I have a big, stupid grin on my face.
This means a few things:
1) I need new, smaller undies
2) I need suspenders for my undies until the new ones can be purchased. (isn't that a sexy picture?!)
3) I will keep up my walking.
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
I currently weigh 219.3 pounds. At 5' 2", that puts my body mass index at 40.1. At 40, I will be considered just regular ol' "obese" instead of "morbidly obese".
Wouldn't you know it, my weight has stalled for the last three weeks. *laugh* I've been stuck just over in Morbidly Obese Land by 0.1. This girl can't catch a break, I swear!
My head is in a somewhat better place than it was when I posted the other day. I had the holiday weekend off of work and enjoyed our annual extended family picnic. Got some sun, played with babies, lost at cards, and chatted with great people. That picnic did wonderful things for my stress level.
I am still struggling with being tired and I still have some really negative thoughts, but it's better than it was and every day is a new day. Once in that mindset, it takes time to fully get back out.
I have a little more perspective, which I really wasn't able to get the other day. I knew a major part of my problem was that I was unable to back up out of the middle of the storm in my head that was overwhelming me and get a good view of what was really going on. Some days are just like that, though, thankfully, not many.
Now, I'm able to see the issues and break them down into more manageable parts, instead of just seeing this huge thing that I somehow needed to deal with.
Wouldn't you know it, my weight has stalled for the last three weeks. *laugh* I've been stuck just over in Morbidly Obese Land by 0.1. This girl can't catch a break, I swear!
My head is in a somewhat better place than it was when I posted the other day. I had the holiday weekend off of work and enjoyed our annual extended family picnic. Got some sun, played with babies, lost at cards, and chatted with great people. That picnic did wonderful things for my stress level.
I am still struggling with being tired and I still have some really negative thoughts, but it's better than it was and every day is a new day. Once in that mindset, it takes time to fully get back out.
I have a little more perspective, which I really wasn't able to get the other day. I knew a major part of my problem was that I was unable to back up out of the middle of the storm in my head that was overwhelming me and get a good view of what was really going on. Some days are just like that, though, thankfully, not many.
Now, I'm able to see the issues and break them down into more manageable parts, instead of just seeing this huge thing that I somehow needed to deal with.
Thursday, May 24, 2012
A glimpse inside my head right now:
I have high anxiety. Yesterday, I had a panic attack. I haven't had one in several years. Thankfully, this one was pretty small--I had a short fit of sobbing, my heart kept racing, and, according to my SO, my eyes were big like a scared animal. To keep from freaking out any more, I took a Lorazepam, curled up in my recliner, cuddled with a cat, and listened to some relaxing classical music on my iPod. Eventually, I fell asleep and woke feeling much calmer.
Last month, I was considering going off my anxiety meds, because I felt so good. This month is so much different. The stress from deciding whether to take the new job is probably a good part of my issues. I was pretty worked up over that. Plus, as my weight decreases, my thyroid medication may need to be lowered. That pill revs up my system. If it's too high, it could be over-amping my anxiety as a side effect.
One moment, I'm fine and the next I'm super stressed out about...well, nothing... and everything. I feel like something bad is going to happen, but I have no idea what. If that lasts a while, then my brain finds other things to stress on.
Two days ago, I was fine with not losing weight. I've been at a stand-still for a couple weeks, but I'm still exercising and changing my shape. Today, I'm depressed about it.
I've lost 97 lbs. I've had a pretty good self image for a while, liking my emerging body. As my anxiety increases, that changes. Right now, I feel big and self conscious. I feel like I'll never get to my goal and this is always going to be a big struggle.
I'm usually very good about throwing off a mood or a funk. I really do push to keep a positive attitude. This one is just giving me a hard time. Being tired all the time doesn't help, but I'm working on that (reasonable amount of sleep, new job, etc.)
I see Dr. Hal, my Internal Med doc and general overseer of my post-op health, in less than a month. At that time, I'll discuss this with him if it is still an issue. Until then, I'm going to try to get out of my head more--keep busy, do things that keep me distracted.
I have high anxiety. Yesterday, I had a panic attack. I haven't had one in several years. Thankfully, this one was pretty small--I had a short fit of sobbing, my heart kept racing, and, according to my SO, my eyes were big like a scared animal. To keep from freaking out any more, I took a Lorazepam, curled up in my recliner, cuddled with a cat, and listened to some relaxing classical music on my iPod. Eventually, I fell asleep and woke feeling much calmer.
Last month, I was considering going off my anxiety meds, because I felt so good. This month is so much different. The stress from deciding whether to take the new job is probably a good part of my issues. I was pretty worked up over that. Plus, as my weight decreases, my thyroid medication may need to be lowered. That pill revs up my system. If it's too high, it could be over-amping my anxiety as a side effect.
One moment, I'm fine and the next I'm super stressed out about...well, nothing... and everything. I feel like something bad is going to happen, but I have no idea what. If that lasts a while, then my brain finds other things to stress on.
Two days ago, I was fine with not losing weight. I've been at a stand-still for a couple weeks, but I'm still exercising and changing my shape. Today, I'm depressed about it.
I've lost 97 lbs. I've had a pretty good self image for a while, liking my emerging body. As my anxiety increases, that changes. Right now, I feel big and self conscious. I feel like I'll never get to my goal and this is always going to be a big struggle.
I'm usually very good about throwing off a mood or a funk. I really do push to keep a positive attitude. This one is just giving me a hard time. Being tired all the time doesn't help, but I'm working on that (reasonable amount of sleep, new job, etc.)
I see Dr. Hal, my Internal Med doc and general overseer of my post-op health, in less than a month. At that time, I'll discuss this with him if it is still an issue. Until then, I'm going to try to get out of my head more--keep busy, do things that keep me distracted.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
As of yesterday afternoon, I have a new job. I accepted that new position I was offered.
I am taking the financial hit, because I decided that my burn out rate was just too high at my current job. Once my mental health is balanced again, if I need more money, I could get a part time job for a couple nights at the beginning of the week.
The new job will allow me to schedule my meds and vitamins, my meals, and my exercising without having to account for flopping from being awake at night to being awake during the day and then back. For my post-op health, this will be great. There's just too much that needs to be planned ahead now and it is too hard to do with a rotating schedule. Plus, I might even eventually have the time and energy to see friends again!
I still have another month at my current position. An email was sent out to the department welcoming me to my new position and stating my switch date was June 25. I'd bet the delay is so that I can help train my replacement.
I am taking the financial hit, because I decided that my burn out rate was just too high at my current job. Once my mental health is balanced again, if I need more money, I could get a part time job for a couple nights at the beginning of the week.
The new job will allow me to schedule my meds and vitamins, my meals, and my exercising without having to account for flopping from being awake at night to being awake during the day and then back. For my post-op health, this will be great. There's just too much that needs to be planned ahead now and it is too hard to do with a rotating schedule. Plus, I might even eventually have the time and energy to see friends again!
I still have another month at my current position. An email was sent out to the department welcoming me to my new position and stating my switch date was June 25. I'd bet the delay is so that I can help train my replacement.
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Okay, I'm vain. I admit it: I want my hair to look good.
Naturally, I am dark blond. Thanks to my good friend Performing Preference, I am generally some shade of red. My skin is super pale, I'm very freckled, and I am green eyed. Why not go red? Most people are surprised to find out my natural color and I've found Reds have more fun anyway. That saying about blonds is bullshit.
Since my hair started falling out a month and a half ago, I have held off on dying my hair. Didn't want to add stress to those follicles. When the Great Fallout began, I'd already been in need of a dye job, but I'd been putting it off because I was lazy.
Thanks to my B Complex vitamin, the loss seems to be minimal lately. My roots, on the other hand, were excessive and the rest of my hair was dull and ugly. So, I dyed it today.
The box was "True Red" or something of the kind, but it came out a light red. I can deal with that. Usually, the first week after dying, my hair is "Ridiculous Red" until it fades to a more natural color. We'll just skip the overly red phase this time.
Whenever I color my hair, even pre-op, I had breakage and some loss. Putting chemicals on hair does that. So, I'm not surprised that there was some today too.
Should I have dyed my hair when it was still falling out from my surgery? Probably not, but I felt so drab. I haven't lost weight in a couple weeks and my hair looked like shit. I wanted to make something better. I could fix my hair.
If I lose more hair, well, I guess what's left will be a pretty color.
In a related, yet not, story: When my mom was pregnant with me, she told people (jokingly!) that if I came out with red hair, she wasn't going to take me home. Guess what color my hair was upon my birth? Yup, I was a red head. She took me home anyway. I was, and am, just that damn cute.
Naturally, I am dark blond. Thanks to my good friend Performing Preference, I am generally some shade of red. My skin is super pale, I'm very freckled, and I am green eyed. Why not go red? Most people are surprised to find out my natural color and I've found Reds have more fun anyway. That saying about blonds is bullshit.
Since my hair started falling out a month and a half ago, I have held off on dying my hair. Didn't want to add stress to those follicles. When the Great Fallout began, I'd already been in need of a dye job, but I'd been putting it off because I was lazy.
Thanks to my B Complex vitamin, the loss seems to be minimal lately. My roots, on the other hand, were excessive and the rest of my hair was dull and ugly. So, I dyed it today.
The box was "True Red" or something of the kind, but it came out a light red. I can deal with that. Usually, the first week after dying, my hair is "Ridiculous Red" until it fades to a more natural color. We'll just skip the overly red phase this time.
Whenever I color my hair, even pre-op, I had breakage and some loss. Putting chemicals on hair does that. So, I'm not surprised that there was some today too.
Should I have dyed my hair when it was still falling out from my surgery? Probably not, but I felt so drab. I haven't lost weight in a couple weeks and my hair looked like shit. I wanted to make something better. I could fix my hair.
If I lose more hair, well, I guess what's left will be a pretty color.
In a related, yet not, story: When my mom was pregnant with me, she told people (jokingly!) that if I came out with red hair, she wasn't going to take me home. Guess what color my hair was upon my birth? Yup, I was a red head. She took me home anyway. I was, and am, just that damn cute.
Saturday, May 19, 2012
Look at me, getting all quiet for a while! Who knew I could be quiet, let alone for nearly two weeks.
Several things come to mind to talk about:
I've been eating beyond my 1,000 cal limit for a few days. I'm usually very careful about keeping under or close to 900 calories a day. Lately, I've just wanted to eat. Could be hormonal. Could be that I didn't have the proper foods in house, so I subconsciously decided to eat whatever I wanted. Could be these are all just excuses. ;)
My work schedule leaves me especially tired, both physically and emotionally. It's hard to get any sort of structure in one's life when working different days of the week all the time.
I decided that a daytime, Monday to Friday job would be beneficial in dealing with my need for a routine and helping me feel less tired all the time. Luckily, there was a posting for a different job in my same department (different facility), so I applied.
I interviewed, which I think went well, and received a voicemail on Thursday saying that HR wanted to talk to me about the position. Sounds promising, right? It was beyond business hours when the person left the voicemail and I didn't get it until even later, so I called back on Friday at 2 PM (the earliest I could drag my butt out of bed. I was tired, like I said). She didn't answer, so I left a voicemail and then I called back at 3 PM with the same result. The person in HR didn't get back to me by the end of the business day on Friday, leaving this drawn out until sometime Monday.
While the idea of a new job with structure sounds great, I'm so very torn over it. There are several pros and cons and I cannot figure out which way to go. One severe con is a loss of a few thousand dollars in income yearly if they do not offer me a raise with the new position. Is getting a structured schedule, which will help me with my post op life--pills, meals, exercise--worth the added financial stress? I just can't decide. I've been thinking about this since I interviewed a week ago and still haven't come to a decision.
I've found that a good B Complex vitamin seems to be helping with hair loss. When I take it faithfully, the loss seems less. If I skip for a week, I start to lose more. This is pretty awesome to know. "Knowledge is power," and all that.
My current pill is not a chewable, but it's a small tablet, no larger than a Tylenol pill. At first, I was concerned that it would cause an intestinal blockage or something, as the doctors drill that possibility into pre-op minds, but I'm sure I've accidentally swallowed a piece of food larger than that without issue (remember: chew, chew, chew your food!).
My weight has been stalled lately. I heard somewhere that it usually happens around 3 months that, due to stress on the body, the system hords weight for a bit. I'm at 5 months and it's just now happening. I'm a late bloomer, I guess.
Other than keeping me 3 lbs from hitting the 100 lb loss mark, I'm not too upset. I'm trying to keep my activity up on my days off and walk during my breaks when I do work. I've had a few people say that I look like I've lost more weight and that really makes me think that I must be gaining muscle and losing fat. Though my weight is stuck, I'm sure my measurements are changing. That is okay by me.
Plus, someone stopped today and said, "anybody told you that you're looking sexy lately?" LOL Who can argue with a question like that?!
Several things come to mind to talk about:
I've been eating beyond my 1,000 cal limit for a few days. I'm usually very careful about keeping under or close to 900 calories a day. Lately, I've just wanted to eat. Could be hormonal. Could be that I didn't have the proper foods in house, so I subconsciously decided to eat whatever I wanted. Could be these are all just excuses. ;)
My work schedule leaves me especially tired, both physically and emotionally. It's hard to get any sort of structure in one's life when working different days of the week all the time.
I decided that a daytime, Monday to Friday job would be beneficial in dealing with my need for a routine and helping me feel less tired all the time. Luckily, there was a posting for a different job in my same department (different facility), so I applied.
I interviewed, which I think went well, and received a voicemail on Thursday saying that HR wanted to talk to me about the position. Sounds promising, right? It was beyond business hours when the person left the voicemail and I didn't get it until even later, so I called back on Friday at 2 PM (the earliest I could drag my butt out of bed. I was tired, like I said). She didn't answer, so I left a voicemail and then I called back at 3 PM with the same result. The person in HR didn't get back to me by the end of the business day on Friday, leaving this drawn out until sometime Monday.
While the idea of a new job with structure sounds great, I'm so very torn over it. There are several pros and cons and I cannot figure out which way to go. One severe con is a loss of a few thousand dollars in income yearly if they do not offer me a raise with the new position. Is getting a structured schedule, which will help me with my post op life--pills, meals, exercise--worth the added financial stress? I just can't decide. I've been thinking about this since I interviewed a week ago and still haven't come to a decision.
I've found that a good B Complex vitamin seems to be helping with hair loss. When I take it faithfully, the loss seems less. If I skip for a week, I start to lose more. This is pretty awesome to know. "Knowledge is power," and all that.
My current pill is not a chewable, but it's a small tablet, no larger than a Tylenol pill. At first, I was concerned that it would cause an intestinal blockage or something, as the doctors drill that possibility into pre-op minds, but I'm sure I've accidentally swallowed a piece of food larger than that without issue (remember: chew, chew, chew your food!).
My weight has been stalled lately. I heard somewhere that it usually happens around 3 months that, due to stress on the body, the system hords weight for a bit. I'm at 5 months and it's just now happening. I'm a late bloomer, I guess.
Other than keeping me 3 lbs from hitting the 100 lb loss mark, I'm not too upset. I'm trying to keep my activity up on my days off and walk during my breaks when I do work. I've had a few people say that I look like I've lost more weight and that really makes me think that I must be gaining muscle and losing fat. Though my weight is stuck, I'm sure my measurements are changing. That is okay by me.
Plus, someone stopped today and said, "anybody told you that you're looking sexy lately?" LOL Who can argue with a question like that?!
Monday, May 7, 2012
I'm learning to like walking a lot. It's fun to see how fast I can go or how far I'll make it. Such a change from a year ago.
The problem now is that I get bored with my music pretty quickly and I use music as a way to distract myself so I keep going. Obviously, it's not good that my music is boring me if I want to keep moving.
While searching for more/new music, I had a thought: "what about audio books?" An ongoing story, if it's good and narrated well, would continually change, so I wouldn't get bored as easily. I could focus on the story, because, really, all I have to concentrate on while walking is putting one foot in front of the other.
I decided this idea had merit, so I joined Audible for only $8 a month for 3 months (jacks up to $15 a month after that). That gives me 1 credit (1 book) per month and a discount on others if I want to buy more. If it doesn't work out, I cancel my subscription. I figured I've spent far more than $8 on something that I hated before. This is a cheap enough risk.
After joining, I couldn't decide on a book. Too much pressure. What if I pick one that's poorly narrated and waste my one credit?! Also, I normally read some really trashy books (yep, like me some smut--especially vampire smut), but the idea of listening to some person read my smutty book to me made me blush. Eventually, I decided on the next book in a (less trashy) vampire series that I'd previously been really into--Night Huntress Series, book 4, by Jeaniene Frost.
Thanks to work and weather, I had to wait to go for a walk outside. Finally, I was able to get out yesterday and test out the audio book/walking idea. It went great!
I ended up walking about 1.3 miles. It took me 45 minutes because I wasn't in a hurry. The narrator took a little getting use to, but, eventually, I was pulled into the story and forgot that someone was reading it to me. In that 45 minutes, I made it through nearly two chapters. That means this book will last me SEVERAL walks, making it well worth my $8. :)
The problem now is that I get bored with my music pretty quickly and I use music as a way to distract myself so I keep going. Obviously, it's not good that my music is boring me if I want to keep moving.
While searching for more/new music, I had a thought: "what about audio books?" An ongoing story, if it's good and narrated well, would continually change, so I wouldn't get bored as easily. I could focus on the story, because, really, all I have to concentrate on while walking is putting one foot in front of the other.
I decided this idea had merit, so I joined Audible for only $8 a month for 3 months (jacks up to $15 a month after that). That gives me 1 credit (1 book) per month and a discount on others if I want to buy more. If it doesn't work out, I cancel my subscription. I figured I've spent far more than $8 on something that I hated before. This is a cheap enough risk.
After joining, I couldn't decide on a book. Too much pressure. What if I pick one that's poorly narrated and waste my one credit?! Also, I normally read some really trashy books (yep, like me some smut--especially vampire smut), but the idea of listening to some person read my smutty book to me made me blush. Eventually, I decided on the next book in a (less trashy) vampire series that I'd previously been really into--Night Huntress Series, book 4, by Jeaniene Frost.
Thanks to work and weather, I had to wait to go for a walk outside. Finally, I was able to get out yesterday and test out the audio book/walking idea. It went great!
I ended up walking about 1.3 miles. It took me 45 minutes because I wasn't in a hurry. The narrator took a little getting use to, but, eventually, I was pulled into the story and forgot that someone was reading it to me. In that 45 minutes, I made it through nearly two chapters. That means this book will last me SEVERAL walks, making it well worth my $8. :)
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
People think that WLS is easy because you can't eat as much. Ah, no, that isn't the case. I can over eat. Tonight, I did just that and I am suffering.
That's the difference between non-surgery and surgery. Before my surgery, if I ate more than what I should, I may have just felt guilty or I may not have if I was mindlessly eating. Post-op, over eating is physically painful and not for just a half hour or something. No, it can hurt for HOURS. I feel like there's a heavy, large rock in upper abdomen (my new, little stomach).
There are three options for what my body will do with the food if there's too much in my stomach: 1) I may suddenly vomit. 2) I may suddenly have a bout of diarrhea**. 3) It will ever so slowly process the food, only allowing a little out of my over-full stomach at a time, prolonging my suffering.
Seems like #3 is going to be tonight's option, though I do keep getting hit with a little nausea.
I know why over ate and knowing triggers is part of preventing future issues, right? My problem was that I'd been so busy tonight at work that, when I finally got to eat, I was still racing. I ate too fast and there wasn't enough time for my stomach to tell my brain I was full before I too much.
I'm usually pretty good about not over eating, but it happens. When it does, my only option is to wait. So, that's what I'm going to do: wait to feel better.
**It was not intentional to make a sentence about diarrhea number two in my list, but still funny in a "I'm mentally a 12 year old" kind of way.
That's the difference between non-surgery and surgery. Before my surgery, if I ate more than what I should, I may have just felt guilty or I may not have if I was mindlessly eating. Post-op, over eating is physically painful and not for just a half hour or something. No, it can hurt for HOURS. I feel like there's a heavy, large rock in upper abdomen (my new, little stomach).
There are three options for what my body will do with the food if there's too much in my stomach: 1) I may suddenly vomit. 2) I may suddenly have a bout of diarrhea**. 3) It will ever so slowly process the food, only allowing a little out of my over-full stomach at a time, prolonging my suffering.
Seems like #3 is going to be tonight's option, though I do keep getting hit with a little nausea.
I know why over ate and knowing triggers is part of preventing future issues, right? My problem was that I'd been so busy tonight at work that, when I finally got to eat, I was still racing. I ate too fast and there wasn't enough time for my stomach to tell my brain I was full before I too much.
I'm usually pretty good about not over eating, but it happens. When it does, my only option is to wait. So, that's what I'm going to do: wait to feel better.
**It was not intentional to make a sentence about diarrhea number two in my list, but still funny in a "I'm mentally a 12 year old" kind of way.
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